dual personalities

Tag: spirituality

March 6, 2023

“There’s two angels sittin’ on my shoulders/All they ever do is disagree”

by chuckofish

It rained cats and dogs for about 18 hours on Friday here in flyover country. Thank goodness it wasn’t snow. I went to my biannual cancer checkup on Friday and had my annual infusion of bone medicine. Always nice to get that over with.

But we had a nice weekend with temps in the 60s. On Saturday daughter #1 and I drove over to Jeff City to check on things there and water her plants. We went to Walmart and bought some bins and made an initial swipe at packing things up. There is a lot to pack.

It was a lovely day to drive through the rolling hills of Osage and Gasconade Counties in mid-MO. I am always up for that. When we got home the OM took us to Hacienda for dinner and Margs.

On Sunday we picked up the twins again and took them to church where they earned an A- on Mamu’s depravity scale for keeping theirs in check. We brought them to our house afterwards so they could play with Mr. Smith. Daughter #3 joined us for bagels. Sadly, the boy was working (of course) and so no pictures were taken.

He did send pictures of a long story the wee bud wrote about a tornado. Here’s a sample:

He’s in kindergarten! I was impressed.

Meanwhile in Maryland, Katiebelle and Idabelle had a visitor. Their Mom’s oldest friend, whom she met in vacation bible school when she was six, came to visit.

They had a super fun time…eating donuts and introducing Julia to Pete the Cat.

Now it is Monday. Have a good one.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow;

praise him all creatures here below;

praise him above, ye heavenly host;

praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

–Thomas Ken, 1709

And here’s a bonus treat: before he became a country music superstar Chris Stapleton was in a bluegrass band…

Woohoo! They were smokin’!

5 Comments
February 27, 2023

While the nearer waters roll

by chuckofish

Well, of course, I had a really lovely time at my Big Event on Friday. I cut the ribbon on a newly renovated room named after me with a pair of hand-crafted wooden scissors which I now have in my office at home.

My former boss, the Dean Emeritus, said kind words about me and I was able to make some extemporaneous remarks without making a fool of myself. I even gave a little testimony about reading through the Bible under the heading “What I’ve been doing since I retired”. I read a poem. There was punch and cookies and I was hugged by a lot of people. Time well spent. God is good.

And in answer to the question, “What did you wear?”–I went full Eileen Fisher–i.e. old work clothes. And I got a corsage.

I spent the rest of the weekend recovering. I did make it to the Kirkwood Historical Society’s Black Heritage event on Saturday at Mudd’s Grove where I met some interesting people and reacquainted myself with a few others. And I got an idea for a Kirkwood Review article about Kirkwood’s own Tuskegee Airman.

The OM and I picked up the twins for church–The boy is still working seven days a week at his store–and I gave them a B+ for depravity control. Pappy was an usher so he was able to distance himself from them, that is until he went up to start passing the plate for the offering and the twins waved vigorously and stage-whispered “Pappy!” to get his attention. Soli deo gloria.

Meanwhile daughter #1 has been hanging out with daughter #2 and her petite famille in Silver Spring.

(That baby is growin’!)

If all goes according to plan and the creek don’t rise, she’ll return home later today. Mr. Smith will be so happy.

Blessed Lord, who wast tempted in all things like as we are, have mercy upon our frailty. Out of weakness give us strength; grant to us thy fear, that we may fear thee only; support us in time of temptation; embolden us in time of danger; help us to do thy work with good courage, and to continue thy faithful soldiers and servants unto our life’s end.

B.F. Westcott (1825-1901)
3 Comments
February 23, 2023

A spirit of power and of love and self-control

by chuckofish

Daffodils,
That come before the swallow dares, and take
The winds of March with beauty; violets dim,
But sweeter than the lids of Juno’s eyes.

–William Shakespeare, The Winter’s Tale (1610–11) act 4, sc. 3, l. 121

Yes, the big storm missed us. It just rained and then the sun came out. No big deal.

Tomorrow I do have a Big Deal–an Event to attend back at my flyover university. It is the kind that makes me very nervous, so pray for me. People always think I am so calm, cool and collected, but little do they know. I will be inwardly reciting my mantra: “For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power and of love and of self-control.” (2 Timothy 1:7)

Plus, I don’t even know what I’m wearing.

But this I call to mind,
    and therefore I have hope:

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
    his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
    great is your faithfulness.

–Lamentations 3:21-23
4 Comments
February 21, 2023

My worried windowpanes

by chuckofish

Don sent this terrific poem, The Man Watching, by Rainer Maria Rilke:

I can tell by the way the trees beat, after

so many dull days, on my worried windowpanes

that a storm is coming,

and I hear the far-off fields saying things

I can’t bear without a friend,

I can’t love without a sister.

The storm, the shifter of shapes, drives on

across the woods and across time,

and the world looks as if it had no age:

the landscape, like a line in the psalm book,

is seriousness and weight and eternity.

What we choose to fight is so tiny!

What fights with us is so great!

If only we would let ourselves be dominated

as things do by some immense storm,

we would become strong too, and not need names.

When we win it’s with small things,

and the triumph itself makes us small.

What is extraordinary and eternal

does not want to be bent by us.

I mean the Angel who appeared

to the wrestlers of the Old Testament:

when the wrestlers’ sinews

grew long like metal strings,

he felt them under his fingers

like chords of deep music.

Whoever was beaten by this Angel

(who often simply declined the fight)

went away proud and strengthened

and great from that harsh hand,

that kneaded him as if to change his shape.

Winning does not tempt that man.

This is how he grows: by being defeated, decisively,

by constantly greater beings.

–Rainer Maria Rilke

I thought this was inspiring and true. “That’s the blessing of God. Just like we hear every Christmas: Immanuel–God with us. No matter the suffering we go through, God’s presence is better than anything our hearts desire. Though my body may fail, my faith and life is fireproof: though there are rumors of war, pestilence, and ruin, and our little sheep eyes can’t hazard what’s ahead, we can trust in the voice of our Shepherd, who is ever near.”

Enjoy your day. Read a poem. Know that God is with you. “My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me.” (John 10:27)

The painting is “Before the Storm” by Isaac Levitan (1860- 1900).

3 Comments
February 16, 2023

The sun breaks through

by chuckofish

I have seen the sun break through
to illuminate a small field
for a while, and gone my way
and forgotten it. But that was the pearl
of great price, the one field that had
the treasure in it. I realize now
that I must give all that I have
to possess it. Life is not hurrying

on to a receding future, nor hankering after
an imagined past. It is the turning
aside like Moses to the miracle
of the lit bush, to a brightness
that seemed as transitory as your youth
once, but is the eternity that awaits you.

“A Bright Field” by R. S. Thomas (1913–2000) 

The painting is by Jacob Van Ruisdael – “View of Haarlem from the North West with the Bleaching Fields in the Foreground” c.1670-1675.

P.S. This is a wonderful response to the Michigan State University shooting by Kevin DeYoung. “As long as there is sin and suffering in the world the gospel will be relevant. Is there more hostility to authentic biblical Christianity than a few decades ago? Probably. But people are still people. They don’t want to be scared, and they don’t want to die. They need forgiveness, they need comfort, they need hope. They need Jesus.”

And Brett McCracken makes a good point here: “In a twist Salvador Dalí and Luis Buñuel likely never saw coming, the avant-garde has, in the 21st century, become middlebrow ennui. Subversion has scaled up like Starbucks, going stale in the process. This means “normal” starts to feel unexpectedly radical…In an age where amoral excess is the bland standard, disciplined restraint is the flavorful exception.”

Have a good day. Read some poetry. Think for yourself.

2 Comments
February 9, 2023

Deep thoughts for Thursday

by chuckofish

We live in the valley of Elah, and daily, Goliath stomps into our terrified lives, shouting, “I defy you!” (1 Sam. 17:10) In God’s powerful name we must come to take our stand. Like David, we must say, “You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied” (v. 45 NIV). If we tremble in the face of Satan, it is never because Satan has grown large, but because our God has grown small.

–Calvin Miller, The Unchained Soul

This is a thoughtful piece about how people need a spiritual life and church. “As we continue to confront the despair pervading our society, we must seek to be the means of God’s grace toward those struggling with the threat of death. And as churches foremost—but also as political communities and society as a whole—we must help people find spiritual life.”

3 Comments
February 8, 2023

Like the new moon thy life appears

by chuckofish

–Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The painting is by Jessie Wilcox Smith.

BTW, an adumbration is an “imperfect representation; something that suggests by resemblance, or shadows forth; a foreshadowing.” I looked it up.

Many are the plans in the mind of a man,
    but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.

–Proverbs 19:21
2 Comments
November 29, 2022

Tidings of comfort and joy

by chuckofish

Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

–James 4:7-8

I am trying to catch up on my bible reading. I fell behind last week. It is a lot, but I am forging ahead. (And it is all pretty great.)

Meanwhile Sunday was the first Sunday in Advent. The year is racing to its conclusion! They have, of course, started playing Christmas music intermittently on the Christian radio station, which can be irritating, but I liked this rendition of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen. (A banjo always adds a lot.)

This was very interesting: “Operation Pedestal: Two Lessons for the Contemporary Spiritual Battle From the Relief of Malta 1942”

Anne, of course, has something good to say about being thankful. “It is the gracious passage of time that makes difficult moments endurable. It is the effulgent light of eternity that makes all the difficulties of the present tolerable.”

And this is a good article about a fellow St. Louisan and Presbyterian who died last week: “When grief holds hands with gratitude.”

Grace and peace to you!

The painting is The Penitent Magdalen by Georges de La Tour, circa 1640.

3 Comments
November 17, 2022

Unspeakably profound

by chuckofish

This article got me thinking about babies and our children and how frivolously we speak of them in and out of the womb.

Indeed, “there is clearly more going on than just a remarkable natural process. It is mysterious and miraculous that a creature would be able to reproduce itself.” Entirely new beings! As a grandmother I have relished watching my three grandchildren grow and change and progress. I paid attention to this with my own kids, but I was always so busy and distracted that I probably didn’t notice all that I should. A grandmother can focus more.

It is amazing to see Katie’s vocabulary expand and her ability to express herself increase daily. She is so similar to her mother and her aunt in looks and demeanor, and yet, she is her own little person.

Of course, our twins, born three months prematurely and spending three full months in the NICU, really are modern-day miracles. Even at a pound and a half, they were fearfully and wonderfully made. The fact that they are bright, healthy, normal kindergartners blows my mind every day.

“For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.” (Psalm 139:13-16)

The other day I quoted from an article where the author said that we live in an age marked by infantile ingratitude. Don’t fall into the trap of being ungrateful. Be grateful for your parents who bore you and to the God who created you. As Walt Whitman wrote, “As to me I know of nothing else but miracles.”

4 Comments
October 28, 2022

To walk in the way of duty

by chuckofish

Another Saturday night, January 1738-39, I had such a sense, how sweet and blessed a thing it was, to walk in the way of duty, to do that which was right and meet to be done, and agreeable to the holy mind of God; that it caused me to break forth into a kind of loud weeping, which held me some time; so that I was forced to shut myself up, and fasten the doors. I could not but as it were cry out, “How happy are they which do that which is right in the sight of God! They are blessed indeed, they are the happy ones!” I had at the same time, a very affecting sense, how meet and suitable it was that God should govern the world, and order all things according to his own pleasure; and I rejoiced in it, that God reigned, and that his will was done.

–Jonathan Edwards, Personal Narrative
2 Comments