family | dual personalities

June 26, 2014

Despite all our outfield saves*

by chuckofish

She was quiet and she stared at the sky. There were many ways of pursuing happiness and perhaps half of them were stupid. Most of the time you were a fool and the rest of it in pain.

–H.E. Bates, A Month at the Lake

Sometimes I feel this way. We all do, right? Sometimes I drive around on Saturday mornings going from estate sale to estate sale, feeling really stupid. And sometimes I think how much fun I would be having if my mother was there to ride around with me. She would have loved it. The driving around. The estate sale-ing. The being with me.

Sigh. My mother died 26 years ago today. I think about how much fun we’ve missed these last 26 years. She never even saw most of her grandchildren.

C’est la vie. We take the bitter with the sweet. We do our best. We are grateful for what we have. And had.

* “Honey, It’s Alright” by Gregory Alan Isakov

5 Comments

June 24, 2014

Being faithful in the little light received*

by chuckofish

Readers of this blog may remember that my great-great grandfather John Simpson Hough was a Quaker. He came from a long line of Quakers who came to Bucks County from England in 1683. The Houghs prospered in Pennsylvania and had many children, many with the same names–such as Benjamin, Hannah, John, Joseph, Silas–which makes genealogy so challenging…But I digress.

After moving West, JSH no longer actively practiced his Quaker faith, but I believe no small part of the high esteem in which he was held was due to his reputation as a fine Quaker gentleman–truthful, (relatively well) educated and beyond reproach in legal and mercantile dealings.

Anyway, the Quakers have always fascinated me. I found this little book recently, written by Robert Lawrence Smith, the former headmaster of the Sidwell Friends School in Washington D.C., the largest Quaker day school in the U.S.

I highly recommend it.

The most valuable aspect of religion is that it provides us with a framework for living. I have always felt that the beauty and power of Quakerism is that it exhorts us to live more truthfully, more simply, more charitably. For many Friends, simplicity is a cornerstone of their faith that continues to define their daily lives….For Quakers, simplicity is truth’s twin virtue: The two concepts are seamlessly intertwined. Without simplicity of spirit, we are not prepared to receive the truth. And if we fail to act in accordance with the truth, we cannot let our lives speak.

* “Being faithful in the little light received, in that light I saw more light; and by it I was taught to trust in God in all my ways, and to consult him to direct my paths.”
(Increase Woodward, 1744-1822)

3 Comments

June 16, 2014

Kickin’ up dust

by chuckofish

So did anyone watch The Horse Soldiers over the weekend? I did and it was as excellent as I remembered.

I also watched a bad Woody Allen movie and caught up with Longmire, finishing season two. Longmire is the A&E show that takes place in Wyoming (but is mostly filmed in New Mexico) about a 21st century sheriff (named Walt Longmire) in a small town and his deputies and Native American friends and enemies. It is pretty good and I like everyone in it. Season three has just started.

Some of you will remember Bailey Chase (far right) from Buffy, season four. How could you forget him?

On Saturday I went to the annual book sale at the Ethical Society, which I have blogged about before. It is such a good sale! I bought two bags of books! What is wrong with me? One of the volunteers brought me a cart from the kitchen to pull around with me, so I wouldn’t have to carry them around. This was nice, but I could tell he wanted to engage me in a conversation, and I wanted none of that. It is bad enough having to overhear/listen to those Prius-driving ethical humanists while they engage in conversation with themselves. Oy.

Just a sample of my $23 purchase–but you can never have too many copies of Leaves of Grass, right?

I also went to a used bookstore where I cashed in a gift certificate a friend gave me for my birthday. I had never been to this store and I have to admit that it always looked vaguely sinister to me from the outside–but I was wrong. They had a lot of good books for sale besides science fiction. And the proprietor did not look (too much) like this guy:

I will definitely go back! You really can’t judge a book (store) by its cover! Haha.

On Sunday I was back at church for Trinity Sunday. The Old Testament lesson was the creation story from the Book of Genesis–the whole story–Genesis 1:1-2:4–which is a long reading, but, boy, is it good. Luckily it was Shirley from the Lay Reader A-Team who read it. High fives all around. If you were not in church on Sunday, I suggest you go read it on your own. Brilliant.

Hope you fathers had a nice day. The OM took several naps.

In honor of Father’s Day, here is a picture from an article in the old Globe Democrat circa 1965 of our pater doing what he loved best–playing war games in our dining room back in the day.

and surveying his vast collection of painted soldiers.

Good times. You can see that the collecting gene prevails in the family. Have a good week!

9 Comments

June 9, 2014

So bye, bye, Miss American Pie

by chuckofish

[At Pentecost Peter] intendeth to prove…that the Church can be repaired by no other means, saving only by the giving of the Holy Spirit. Therefore, forasmuch as they did all hope that the restoring drew near, he accuseth them of sluggishness, because they do not once think upon the way and means thereof. And when the prophet saith, “I will pour out,” it is, without all question, that he meant by this word to note the great abundance of the Spirit….when God will briefly promise salvation to his people, he affirmeth that he will give them his Spirit. Hereupon it followeth that we can obtain no good things until we have the Spirit given us.

–John Calvin, Commentary on the Acts of the Apostles

Sunday was Pentecost, but I stayed home and got busy cleaning. It is how I deal with the feeling that comes over me when one of my children leaves again.

Daughter #2 left for Chicago on Saturday and is there now. Then in a few days she will head back to Maryland for the summer. She has a long drive ahead but she is in good company, so it will be fun.

Aforementioned Good Company

Meanwhile I keep busy dusting, vacuuming etc. It works for me. Onward and upward.

I also worked in the yard.

FYI: the pumpkin plants appear to be thriving, although only time will tell.

Also I have lots of good books to read

and good movies to watch, such as this one, which I watched Sunday night.

This guy always cheers me up.

And now I am back at work with lots of catching up to do! Have a good week!

4 Comments

June 4, 2014

“You give such charming parties, Mr. Charles.”*

by chuckofish

Oh boy, quelle weekend! Never have I been to such a multi-day nuptial event. It was so well organized and perfect and, at the same time, unpretentious. But I shouldn’t be surprised. That sort of describes my friend whose daughter got married.

[Let me interject here that I did not spend my time taking pictures. A few times I hauled out my iPhone to snap something when I remembered my blog, but mostly I forgot. I took my good camera to the Botanical Garden and that was it. Mea culpa.]

My two daughters and I rendesvous-ed in College Park, spending one night at daughter #1’s cool pad where we toasted the weekend with custom cocktails by Nate, which was appropriate, because we proceeded to toast everything all weekend. It was that kind of weekend. Daughter #2 cooked and that is always a reason to celebrate as well.

We shoved off bright and early on Friday morning in order to reach Norfolk in time for the 2nd party (we missed the first one on Thursday night) which was a luncheon and cruise onboard a three-masted schooner.

Yes, amazing, right? We reacquainted ourselves with old friends.

After tooling around Norfolk Harbor for a couple of hours, we headed back to our waterside hotel and all fell deeply asleep. (I dreamed that the old man–who, by the way, was at a conference and not the wedding–held an estate sale and sold all my stuff, but that’s another story.)

We awoke in time to get dressed to go out to dinner before changing again for party #3 at a private club down the street. Sorry, I only recorded the view out the window.

The next day we headed to the Norfolk Botanical Garden which was fabulous. We walked all around and then hopped on the tram for a second time around.

See the turtle?

Adorable that we packed the same outfit, right?

After departing the Garden we found a great place to have lunch and drank a pitcher of Sangria. Then we proceeded to get ready for the main event.

Don’t worry–we were hydrating.

We boarded a double decker tour bus for the church and the lovely ceremony. Do I have a picture of the bride and groom? Of course not. (But there was no picture taking in the church anyway.) Oh well, take my word for it–they were like the couple on the top of the cake.

We got back on the bus and headed to the reception at the Yacht Club. Picture perfect and a band that played everything from Motown to Pharrell. The guests danced for hours. I think I did too.

There was an after party, but I did not attend. I bid adieu to the young folks who have more stamina than I. The next day we packed our bags

and headed over to party #4–brunch at the lovely home of the bride’s parents.

The bride’s mother was planning to go to work the next day. Hello.

Thankfully we are a bit out of focus.

We hopped in the car and hit the road again. Sigh.

The Thin Man (1934) of course

6 Comments

May 29, 2014

Gaily bedight*

by chuckofish

Today I am on the road to College Park, by way of Baltimore, to meet up with my lovely daughters. We are road-tripping together to Virginia to attend a wedding this weekend, so I will be off the radar for a few days. I hope my dual personality will fill in the blanks while I am incognito.

Have a great weekend and keep the faith!

*Gaily bedight, a gallant knight” is the first line of the poem “Eldorado” by Edgar Allan Poe. It always makes me want to “ride, boldly ride”.

3 Comments

May 27, 2014

“I call that bold talk for a one-eyed fat man.”*

by chuckofish

Oh, I do love a three-day weekend, don’t you?

That extra day just makes a huge difference. Saturday and Sunday were filled with the usual activities: Estate sale-ing where I found this vintage needlepoint pillow

“He’s just a dandy-lion”

and this little garden armadillo with a broken ear and tail.

I went grocery shopping and the boy came over to borrow tools. I went to church, did yard work and laundry. Then the boy and daughter #3 came over for a Memorial Day bar-b-que on Sunday night.

We sat outside and drank beer. Then ate inside–James Beard’s steak and onion sandwiches that were one of my mother’s specialties.

We had a fun evening (and cake). If you are wondering, we had our Memorial Day bar-b-que a day early, because they were going to the Cardinals game on Monday. It was the 5oth anniversary re-match World Series game with the Yankees (can you believe it’s been 50 years?!) and everyone got a World Series replica ring.

On Monday I read leisurely and then proceeded to clean out the bookshelves in the den. Quelle dusty job. I moved some books around and made many, many trips to the basement and to the second floor. I found some books that daughter #2 might like to add to her shelves and I found some others that can be moved to the give-away box. In the cabinets below the bookshelves I rearranged and straightened the photo albums. I threw some stuff away like all our VHS tapes of recorded from TV Miami Vice episodes. I found a few long-lost gems, but a lot more things that are in the why-have-I-kept-this-all-these-years category. I was in a clear-it-out mood. Zut alors! The corner looks nice and refreshed.

While I was doing this I half-watched some rather schmaltzy war movies on TCM, including The White Cliffs of Dover (1944) made during WWII with Irene Dunne. They pulled out all the propaganda stops with this one! It was enjoyable though, because Irene Dunne is always good and it had the MGM line-up of supporting stars including Frank Morgan (the Wizard of Oz) who personified the all-American American. When the American troops arrived to save the day in both WWI and WWII while the band played Sousa, even I got a little misty-eyed.

But it being John Wayne’s birthday, I had to cleanse my palate with something better.

I chose True Grit (1969).

Excellent choice.

*Ned Pepper in True Grit (1969)

8 Comments

May 22, 2014

Throwback Thursday

by chuckofish

Here is a picture of all the cousins (minus Tim who was not born yet) in Michigan circa 1993. You can click on it to enlarge.

My question for you: Is the cool dude in the blue shorts wearing his sister’s shoes?

Well, I don’t know about those shoes. They look huge. The boy always was one for making a witty fashion statement.

And another thing: look at how much the boy looks like his uncle at the same age:

My older brother liked to wear a string tie with a cool bola he had which was a silver holster with a six-shooter, I think. He was always a spiffy dresser too.

11 Comments

May 19, 2014

“Things happen and we do our best to keep in the saddle.”*

by chuckofish

How was your weekend? Mine was relatively quiet and low-key. No socializing, no trips downtown, no eating out. Just a lot of puttering about in the house and garden. The weather was lovely–cool and sunny.

The OM and I attempted to go to the boy’s play-off game, but we went to the wrong school. We drove around the Priory campus wondering where everyone was. It never occurred to our befuddled minds that it was, indeed, a HOME game. We surrendered and went home. C’est la vie.

I contemplated staying in bed and reading on Sunday morning, but I went to church because I remembered that I had given the altar flowers in memory of my parents and my friend Irene. They were very nice.

The church does not list, thank you…but I guess I do.

One of the readers was a scion of what we used to call a “socially-prominent” flyover family–does anyone say that anymore?–who makes a practice of wearing old baggy blue jeans to church. Furthermore, he looks like he has been wearing the same pair all week while driving his tractor around the south forty. I suppose we should be happy he tucks his shirt in. He has the flowing locks and facial hair of someone who would have fit right in with Bedford Forrest at Shiloh. I don’t know why this always bothers me, but it does. I mean, c’mon.

Besides the regular sermon, there was a children’s sermon given by our choir director to a group of younguns who scampered up to the chancel to sit on the floor and listen attentively. At the end he led them in song and they were adorable and quite amusing. They cheered me up. There is one little girl who can answer every question posed and belts out every hymn like a mini Martha Raye. If this child doesn’t grow up to be something special, I’ll eat my hat.

In the afternoon I read outside–a most unusual and lovely pastime.

In conclusion I should note that seventy-nine years ago, at the age of 46, T.E. Lawrence, better known as “Lawrence of Arabia”, was fatally injured in an accident on his motorcycle in Dorset. Six days later (on May 19) he died.

Lawrence on his Brough Superior SS100

He was buried in Dorset. There is a memorial in the very old Anglo-Saxon Church of St. Martin

and a memorial bust in the crypt of St.Paul’s Cathedral.

I will leave it to my dual personality, who has read a lot more than I about T.E. and has visited his resting place, to write about him sometime, but I thought we should take note of his passing.

He was a gallant soldier and a Christian gentleman and more than worthy of a toast to that effect tonight.

*T.E.L. I had this quote on my senior page. It could be my mantra.

3 Comments

May 12, 2014

“There ought to be a hall of fame for mamas.”*

by chuckofish

How was your weekend? Mine was a busy one.

We went downtown. The sky threatened, but nothing much happened.

The Shocktop–mobile was down on Clark Street with a beer tap in the trunk and lots of girls in hotpants throwing bar towels up to us on the balcony. (I got one. Thanks.)

You could see into Busch Stadium from our vantage point, but the Cardinals were away Friday night.

Happily my friend in Atlanta sent me this from Wednesday night’s game:

Saturday afternoon I went to cheer on the Hounds in the boy’s lacrosse game to no avail. They lost, but it was a lovely day to sit on folding chairs and enjoy the breeze. The OM ate a hotdog, a hamburger and a brat. I got sunburned in awkward places. Good times.

Coach Compton restrains himself

Sunday I went to church where I substituted for both lectors and got a high-five from Jim, the assisting priest. I also heard that the boy’s best man and best friend (finally) got the green light from the Bishop of New York to become an Episcopal Priest. The number of hoops our denomination makes a person jump through is truly astonishing. Now he will start applying to divinity schools and continue to wait for another year to get the ball rolling. So hats off to Michael and cheers to a fine young man.

And as the weekend drew to a close, we went to the boy’s house where he and daughter #3 prepared a delicious Mother’s Day bar-be-que dinner for us, her parents and her lovely grandmother.

What a great weekend!

*Well, there ain’t, but there is a country song: “The Hand That Rocks the Cradle”…

There ought to be a hall of fame for mamas
Creation’s most unique and precious pearls
And heaven help us always to remember
That the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world

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