dual personalities

Tag: family

June 16, 2022

I will praise your name

by chuckofish

I am that old lady! But the week is nearing an end. (Thank goodness.)

These homeschooled/Christian- and public-school kids are smart, disciplined, knowledgeable, and enthusiastic. They are allowed and encouraged to blow off steam during music (lots of jumping and hand movements) and during games, so they are ready to calm down and focus during crafts and Bible study. No one has complained about the heat (yet) and I haven’t heard a whine or mean word. (One girl did use a tone with me.) There are lots of teenage volunteers to pick up the slack for us oldsters. The games leader is a tall, handsome West Point cadet home for three weeks on break. The kids are all crazy about him, of course, and do not mind getting hot and sweaty and drenched with water balloons. (I am much less enthusiastic.)

But as Tim Challies advises, I have “embraced my finitude”—i.e. the fact that I am limited and weak and in so many ways insufficient and incapable. “This is a feature of your humanity rather than a bug.”

Anyway, I will make it through the week and then will have succeeded in making a few new friends and feeling more a part of my new church. Not a small thing for a super introvert who would prefer to not. Yay, me!

And the black bears are back! Ay caramba!

Thank you, sir, for saying this.

I liked this article a lot. “Whereas we denizens of late modernity are wandering in the fog of the simultaneous global renegotiation of all human custom, and consequently pining for nodal points of orientation, it seems fitting to remind ourselves that it is of the very essence of said “nodes” that they force no ultimate choice betwixt — ” Food for thought!

And in other news, Katiebelle’s mother gave her a haircut.

Perfect hair wasted on a toddler!

P.S. I almost have the hand movements down to this VBS song which doesn’t involve much jumping and so is my favorite. Also the lyrics are pretty familiar, right?

5 Comments
June 9, 2022

What are you reading/watching?

by chuckofish

I have to admit that my reading material has not been terribly cerebral these days. But it is summer and that’s my excuse.

I have been re-reading books from Craig Johnson’s Longmire series and enjoying them anew. Walt and Henry Standing Bear are old friends and it is always a treat to be reunited.

I am also reading Confessions of a French Atheist, which I heard about on Carl Trueman’s Mortification of Spin podcast. Guillaume Bignon is an analytical philosopher and computer scientist working in New York’s financial industry. He is also an evangelical Christian whose conversion story is very interesting. “As the foundations of his unbelief began to crumble, Bignon discovered the wonder of a God that offers salvation freely and not by good works.”

Chris Kyle’s American Gun, which he was writing at the time of his untimely death, is a timely read.

“There’s a saying that to really know someone you have to walk a mile in their shoes. I’d add that to really know our ancestors, we have to put on more than their shoes, which were generally poor- fitting and leaky. Hitch a plow to an ox and work a field for a few hours, and you come away with a whole new appreciation for what your great-great-grandpa did come spring on the Ohio frontier. Pick up a Kentucky long rifle and aim it at a fleeing whitetail, and you’ll learn real quick about how important it is to use every bit of an animal you harvest; you may not have another one down for quite a while.”

This man understood context.

“Whether they’re used in war or for keeping the peace, guns are just tools. And like any tool, the way they’re used reflects the society they’re part of. As times change, guns have evolved. If you don’t like guns, blame it on the society they’re part of.”

As for what I have been watching, it is a combination of the usual old and vintage movies and some newer documentaries. I watched The Jesus Music (2021), directed by the Erwin brothers, and featuring interviews with prominent Christian artists like Amy Grant, Michael W. Smith, Toby McKeehan, Kirk Franklin et al. I am old enough to remember the Jesus Freaks of the 1970s, but I had no idea there were Heavy Metal Christian bands in the 1980s. It really is fascinating to watch.

I also watched The Capote Tapes (2019) which is another look at the court jester of the rich and powerful set. There is nothing really new revealed in this documentary, but I have always liked Truman Capote. He was a very talented writer and his demons were real and actually quite relatable. At the end of the movie Andre Leon Talley talks about the items he bought at the auction of Capote’s estate. The thing he wishes he had gotten was an old tin still filled with the cookies Truman’s Cousin Sook had sent him long, long ago. That just about did me in.

(Both documentaries are available on Hulu.)

Meanwhile, I am gearing up and getting my head in the right place for Vacation Bible School next week. Again, I say, keep me in your prayers.

P.S. How could I have forgotten to mention that the wee twins “graduated” from pre-kindergarten last week. What ho, on to kindergarten in the fall!

What are you reading and watching?

2 Comments
June 6, 2022

“Awake and sing, you who dwell in dust”*

by chuckofish

It is good to give thanks to the Lord,
And to sing praises to Your name, O Most High;
To declare Your lovingkindness in the morning,
And Your faithfulness every night…

Psalm 92: 1-2

How was your weekend? We enjoyed another sunny, beautiful weekend in flyover country with plenty of patio sittin’.

On Saturday daughter #1 and I attended a special Flag Day luncheon at my DAR chapter. We both are officially members now, she in Jefferson City and I in the local Olde Towne Fenton chapter where you will recall I gave a talk about the Santa Fe Trail back in November. I knew not a soul when I joined, but I am enjoying this group of patriotic, history-loving women. My daughter, having been an active member of her college sorority, is even more at home in this organization. It is all new to me–the rituals etc–but I am learning the ropes.

Our becoming members was facilitated by my grandmother having been a member, since she had done all the work researching our patriot, Moses Wheeler. All I had to do was fill in the intervening years since she joined in 1938. I am looking forward to finding out more about our other family patriots, notably in the Carnahan, Putnam, Stanley, Tukey, Sargent, Chamberlin lines. (The Houghs were Quakers–I assume they didn’t fight in the Revolution, although some Quakers did participate, notably Thomas Paine and Nathanael Green.) It is good to have a project! Hopefully my DP will get involved as well.

The rest of my weekend was relatively quiet. I stayed after church on Sunday to attend the training class for VBS volunteers. Yes, you read that correctly. I volunteered to help with the Vacation Bible School being held the week after next. There will be 225 little kids (!) there, so they were desperate for volunteers! I heeded the call. I am the crew leader for a group of 4/5th grade girls. Zut alors! I hope I can handle it. Also it occurred to me (belatedly) that it will no doubt be 100 degrees in the shade and we will be outside the whole time…Pray for me.

Meanwhile, dear Katiebelle celebrated her 2nd birthday and I was sad to miss being with her…

…but we FaceTimed. We’ll see her in three weeks!

The wee laddie went with his dad over to Illinois across the river to the first ever Nascar race in that state. They even had pit passes. He was, of course, in hog heaven…

I mean, seriously. Ka-Chow!

*Isaiah 26:19

3 Comments
June 2, 2022

June, she’ll change her tune

by chuckofish

Well, here we are–a new month and the year almost half over! It is also the start of the festivities celebrating Queen Elizabeth’s Platinum Jubilee.

We wish her well. Here are some thoughts on a long monarchy and what comes next for the church. “Queen Elizabeth is a devout Christian and has increasingly made this clear through her annual Christmas broadcasts. At the same time, she is the representative of a sort of national folk-Christianity; a symbol of a time when Britain was a Christian nation. As such, she has allowed us to fool ourselves that things are not as bad as they could be. The nation still has a Christian heart.”

And, boy, this rings true:

“Where men are forbidden to honour a king they honour millionaires, athletes, or film-stars instead: even famous prostitutes or gangsters. For spiritual nature, like bodily nature, will be served; deny it food and it will gobble poison.”
― C.S. Lewis, Present Concerns

Do you think he was talking about us?

Anyway, it is feeling decidedly like summer around here. Here’s a summery snapshot of my grandmother (Catherine) and her beau/future husband (Bunker Cameron) circa 1919 with some great-aunt in between.

Bunker is, of course, goofing around wearing someone else’s hat. Catherine thinks it’s hilarious. Who knows what the old lady thinks–but she was probably amused by Bunker too.

I went to the dances at Chandlerville,
And played snap-out at Winchester.

One time we changed partners,
Driving home in the midnight of middle June,
And then I found Davis.
We were married and lived together for seventy years,
Enjoying, working, raising the twelve children,
Eight of whom we lost
Ere I had reached the age of sixty.
I spun, I wove, I kept the house, I nursed the sick,
I made the garden, and for holiday
Rambled over the fields where sang the larks,
And by Spoon River gathering many a shell,
And many a flower and medicinal weed–
Shouting to the wooded hills, singing to the green valleys.
At ninety-six I had lived enough, that is all,
And passed to a sweet repose.
What is this I hear of sorrow and weariness,
Anger, discontent and drooping hopes?
Degenerate sons and daughters,
Life is too strong for you–
It takes life to love Life.

–Edgar Lee Master, “Lucinda Matlock–Spoon River Anthology”
3 Comments
May 30, 2022

How lucky

by chuckofish

We had a beautiful, sunshine-y weekend and we took good advantage of it. Daughter #1 came home on Friday to attend the funeral of our old friend Bob. He and his wife, who we met at our old church, switched to the Anglican Church many years ago and were pillars of that small congregation. The church was overflowing with friends and family and we were happy to get seats. One son and a granddaughter gave heartfelt eulogies; he was a much-loved patriarch of a large and loving family.

Bob and and his wife Sue always had time for our family; indeed, they were often stand-in grandparents for our kids who had none, taking them to the movies, and attending school plays, graduations, holidays, weddings, even the V.P. Ball, with us. And every New Years Day for years we attended their spades party where a potpourri of guests played a round-robin spades tournament with randomly selected partners. Frequently daughter #2 was paired with Bob, who good-naturedly played with a six or seven-year old. They invited us to their camp at the Lake of the Ozarks. They were swell.

Bob was indeed a saint, a child of God, and now he is among that “cloud of witnesses” that surrounds us. (Hebrews 12:1) Into paradise may the angels lead thee, Bob. At your coming may the martyrs greet thee, and bring you into the holy city Jerusalem.

Daughter #1 also came home in order to attend a birthday party on Saturday, but it was canceled at the last minute. So because it was such a beautiful day, we drove to Faust Park in west St. Louis County. The park is 200 acres on a tract of land that once belonged to the second governor of Missouri, Frederick Bates.

The estate includes a house, barn and three log buildings that were built around 1817-1819. Faust also is the home to the Butterfly House and a carousel. We walked around the “historic village” and toured the Butterfly House, which is like a mini Climatron with lots of exotic butterflies.

After lunch we went home and sat on the patio for three hours sipping margaritas and watching the birds and squirrels enjoy Happy Hour in the mulberry tree. They are rather comical to watch as they gorge on the over-ripe berries and get tipsy. (The squirrels hang like monkeys reaching for berries and the Robins fall off the branches.) We even saw a Pilated Woodpecker–very exciting!

On Sunday after church the wee twins came over to eat bagels and frolic outside while the grown-ups indulged in driveway sittin’.

Watering the flowers (the bud’s idea) ended in filling the baby pool and drenching themselves.

Can you imagine anything more fun?

Today is Memorial Day–lest we forget–so I will be watching They Were Expendable (1945) and giving heartfelt thanks for our veterans, past and present.

Sidenote: We also watched Dog (2022) this weekend. It is a great movie about veterans.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=od3vDkhrC_E

A toast to Channing who co-wrote and co-produced the film.

4 Comments
May 16, 2022

Postcards from the weekend

by chuckofish

As anticipated, our long weekend visit from daughter #2 and Katie was super fun. It was so sad to see them off at the airport on Sunday and then to wave goodbye to daughter #1 as she headed back to mid-MO. Sigh. But we did a lot of of our favorite things…

Ted Drewes! Yummy!

The traditional extra large Diet Cokes from the Mac’s drive-through…

Walking through Laumeier Sculpture Park…

Cooling off with the cousins…

Bringing out the Cozy Coupe…

Going to Grant’s Farm…

We also enjoyed some quiet time…

All in all, truly a most wonderful visit for which we are most grateful! I’m also grateful that everyone got home safe and sound to their respective abodes. Today I will spend the day recovering and cleaning up!

7 Comments
May 12, 2022

This and that

by chuckofish

Another hot one! In fact, we broke a record yesterday with a high of 94 degrees. Back in the day, we would still have been at school on May 12–where there was no air-conditioning! How ever did we survive? Well, we did somehow. For several years in high school, I had long, waist-length hair which I wore in braids in order to stay cool.

Even after it cooled off, I still wore the braids, because they were practical. I can’t remember if anyone else at my school wore braids. It was probably just nerds like me and Judy Hensler on Leave It to Beaver…

and Willie Nelson…

C’est la vie.

Well, I seem to have once again gone down a rabbit hole in my brain. Mea culpa. Here’s the poem by Sara Teasdale I was going to share before I went off the track. It’s called “Sunset: St. Louis”…

Here’s a photo of the riverfront in 1938, taken a few years after she wrote the poem, but you get the idea.

It is a totally different riverfront than we have today.

Well, daughter #1 is driving in from Jeff City this morning and we are picking up daughter #2 and the precocious Katiebelle at the airport this afternoon.

Stay tuned for super fun. In the meantime here are a couple of links which I enjoyed. Read them or not; I leave that up to you.

5 1/2 Habits of Remarkably Ineffective People. “Today, many of the institutions and ideas that have shaped our culture are on life-support. And it has been “successful” people who have led us to this place. This “post-everything” moment offers us an opportunity to question what seems unquestionable, to study our values — and maybe even reconsider Jesus’ upside-down approach.”

Stop Praying “Be With” Prayers. “All that matters may be brought before God, but we must always bring before God those things that matter most.”

1 Comment
May 10, 2022

Let’s face the music and dance

by chuckofish

Today we celebrate the birthday of Fred Astaire (May 10, 1899 – June 22, 1987), American actor, dancer, singer, choreographer par excellence. Fred was born in Omaha, Nebraska where he started performing at age five. I always liked his movies from the 1930s the best–the ones with Ginger Rogers–but he was in some good movies later in a long and storied career.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ILxo-TUkzOQ

He wasn’t much to look at and his singing voice was a warbly soprano, but he could sure dance like nobody’s business. So let’s watch a Fred Astaire movie tonight. They’re always good for what ails you. Here’s a list.

And there’s this…I gather Fred was not amused…

This interview with Saint Paul on the subject of what is wrong with us is brilliant. Just to make things crystal clear.

This article about the late Sen. Orrin Hatch makes me like him even more.

This is hilarious.

Meanwhile, it finally stopped raining and we have been enjoying beautiful weather. It is also getting hot and we had to turn on the air-conditioning. Zut alors, it is May 10!

This little gal and her mommy are arriving on Thursday, so I have to get busy preparing the house for visitors. Woohoo!

4 Comments
May 9, 2022

“Read poems as prayers,” he said…

by chuckofish

“and for your penance, translate me something by Juan de la Cruz.”*

Although I think of my mother every day, Mother’s Day is an occasion to give a special thought to the woman who loved me fiercely and without ebb.

My mother taught me to like poetry. (I certainly did not learn to at school.) She liked to read poems out loud and she liked to write them.

She never really got around to teaching me to cook or sew or really anything very practical, but we watched a lot of movies together and listened to a lot of records and talked about a lot of books we read. We took long drives together and went out to lunch. We went shopping and went to art museums and pointed out the things we liked. Pretty much this is what I did with my own children while they were growing up and still do whenever we can.

We pass down the love of poetry and a predilection for historical fiction and biography as well as the old furniture and handmade dresses. We pass on the love.

Here’s a favorite poem by one of my faves, Jorge Luis Borges, which seems particularly resonant on Mother’s Day.

From a lineage of Protestant ministers

and South American soldiers

who fought, with their incalculable dust,

against the Spaniards and the desert’s lances,

I am and I am not. My true lineage

Is the voice, which I can still hear, of my father

celebrating Swinburne music,

and the great volumes I have leafed through,

leafed through and never read, which was enough.

I am whatever the philosophers told me.

Chance or destiny, those two names

for a secret thing we’ll never understand,

lavished me with homelands: Buenos Aires,

Nara, where I spent a single night,

Geneva, Iceland, the two Cordobas…

I am the hollow solitary dream

in which I lose or try to lose myself,

the bondage between two twilights,

the old mornings, the first

time I saw the sea or an ignorant moon,

without its Virgil and without its Galileo.

I am every instant of my lengthy time,

every night of scrupulous insomnia,

Every parting and every night before.

I am the faulty memory of an engraving

That’s still here in the room and that my eyes,

Now darkened, once saw clearly:

The Knight, Death, and the Devil.

I am that other one who saw the desert

and in its eternity goes on watching it.

I am a mirror, an echo. The epitaph.

–“Yesterdays” translated by Stephen Kessler

*Seamus Heaney, “Station Island XI”

4 Comments
May 2, 2022

Gracious God, my heart renew, make my spirit right and true…

by chuckofish

…cast me not away from thee, let thy Spirit dwell in me…*

It was a quiet weekend…except for an earthquake on Friday evening!

The OM and I were watching the news when we thought we heard two loud booms and the house shook for a second. We thought it might be a) an earthquake, b) an explosion or c) a bad car crash. Daughter #1 texted a little while later that she had received a ‘push alert’ about an earthquake in Valley Park.

Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change
And though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea;
Though its waters roar and foam,
Though the mountains quake at its swelling pride. Selah.

–Psalm 46: 2-3

What next? Do we dare ask?

I cajoled the OM into accompanying me on Saturday to an open house held at the 1816 log house in Affton, MO, which will be disassembled and moved to the Thomas Sappington House Historic Site in Crestwood.

This is a great example of a small local group working tirelessly to preserve a small piece of history. They are still raising money so that the two Sappington cousins’ houses built in the early 1800s – Thomas’ brick house, now a museum, and Joseph’s log house (above)–can be preserved together. (The log cabin is currently located in a residential area, surrounded by small homes, and has been lived in by private owners all these years.)

There are lots of people who could just write a big check and make this happen but historic preservation is not high on most people’s priority lists these days. C’est la vie. It will happen, one small donation at a time.

On Sunday we met up with the boy and the wee twins at church per usual and then headed home afterwards for some brunch and driveway sittin’. (It was perfect weather for driveway sittin’ but I have no pictures of us just sittin’…)

Waitin’ for brunch with my old Tyrolean village…
Practising that nice PGA swing
We hauled out the old shopping cart–always a fave

And we always have fun looking for the hidden animals in the yard…

…and seeing what’s about to bloom…Iris buds!

I was struck in church by the thought of how blessed I was to be sitting between my husband and my grown son. This, after decades of being the “Widow Compton” at my old Episcopal Church, is not a small thing. (One old lady even thought I had married the actual widower with whom I generally shared a pew!) But the menfolk in my family like the new church–and no wonder–it is full of men! (I like it for that reason too.) Discuss among yourselves.

I watched the Horse Soldiers (1959) in honor of Ulysses Grant and Bing Russell and thoroughly enjoyed it.

It is such a great movie. I don’t understand why it is so often considered to be one of John Ford’s lesser films. The stars are great together and the supporting cast is without parallel in my opinion. It was filmed on location in Mississippi and so has an authenticity a lot of Civil War dramas lack. (Compare the plantation Greenbriar in this movie to Tara.) Ford himself tended to dismiss the film, in large part I think because a stuntman was killed while filming. This greatly upset him and he ended filming the movie abruptly and returned to California.

Matthew Brady takes a picture.

Nevertheless, it is one of my favorites.

It is supposed to rain on and off again all week, but oh well. I’ll find something to do.

*The Psalter, 1912

4 Comments