Episcopal Church | dual personalities

May 16, 2023

Le dons de Dieu pour le peuple de Dieu

by chuckofish

One of the books I grabbed at the estate sale last Saturday was a Book of Common Prayer en francais.

Although I took French for something like ten years growing up, I am the first to admit that I learned next to nothing. I was able to pass the foreign language requirement (barely) in order to get a master’s degree back in 1979 and I have a pretty good ear and can watch French television shows–but that’s about it.

We do not presume to come to this thy Table, O merciful Lord, trusting in our own righteousness, but in thy manifold and great mercies. We are not worthy so much as to gather up the crumbs under thy Table. But thou art the same Lord whose property is always to have mercy. Grant us therefore, gracious Lord, so to eat the flesh of thy dear Son Jesus Christ, and to drink his blood, that we may evermore dwell in him, and he in us. Amen.

How great is that? I am going to have fun reading and trying to remember some of these prayers in French.

Of course, we Presbyterians have a problem with “written prayers” because they frequently mask the emptiness of the heart. This short article by Derek Thomas explains how outward demonstrations of piety may be no more than mere hypocrisy.

And I loved this. “Can you imagine how proud you’d be if you were this 13-year-old sniper’s parents? Job SERIOUSLY well done, young man.” True story.

Have a good Tuesday!

J’aime le Seigneur: il entend le cri de ma prière…

2 Comments

September 14, 2021

“Questions I have many, answers but a few”*

by chuckofish

What are you reading? I just finished Blowing the Bloody Doors Off, a memoir by the actor Michael Caine.

I have to admit I enjoyed it a lot. He writes well and he is a very positive fellow who has enjoyed his life, from a happy, but what we might term, disadvantaged upbringing in London to international stardom. He is grateful and he is happy to share what he has learned. The book is full of practical advice for actors, but it is all applicable to the rest of us.

I remember Roger Moore, years ago, saying to me “Cheer up. You’d better have a good time because this is not a rehearsal, this is life. This is the show.”

Yes, indeed. He is all about hard work: know your lines, be on time, don’t fool around.

When you are prepared, you are able to subdue your fear, control your nerves, channel your energy, and enter that state of highly alert relaxation that is spontaneity’s best friend.

Don’t think you deserve anything.

Find something you want to do and learn how to do it really well. Take what you got and make the most of it. Learn how to do something, whatever it is, you would choose to do for nothing. Whatever it is, when you are doing it, it makes you feel amazing and most yourself. Throw yourself into it. Challenge yourself to be the best you can be. We can’t all be famous actors. But, if you can find something you love and if that something will also pay the bills, you will be on your way to your own personal paradise.

Anyway, now I am going to watch a lot of Michael Caine movies. He is the first to admit that he has made a lot of bad ones. (I watched Swarm recently and, despite its stellar cast, it is pretty terrible.) But I watched The Man Who Would be King (1975) the other night and enjoyed it.

Caine and his good friend Sean Connery are perfectly cast as the two British soldiers who set out to be kings of Kafiristan in the Rudyard Kipling story. “We meet upon the level, and part upon the square.”

Next up: Zulu (1964), The Italian Job (1969) and Alfie (1966).

We will also note the passing of “controversial” Episcopal Bishop John Shelby Spong–as Anne Kennedy describes him, “that famous Episcopal bishop who denied so many tenets of the Christian faith that eventually he ran out of stuff to deny. And yet, he remained a bishop.” Listen to her podcast to find out “why that’s not a good thing and how to avoid it.” She and her husband are right on target about actual heresy and how it takes over the church because everyone is too embarrassed to say anything. “The Episcopal bishop in Hell believes he has led a courageous life.”

Can you believe it has been 18 years since Johnny Cash died? Well, it has–September 12, 2003.

So a belated toast to Johnny and here’s Bob on Johnny’s show back in the good ol’ days.

“If, then, I were asked for the most important advice I could give, that which I considered to be the most useful to the men of our century, I should simply say: in the name of God, stop a moment, cease your work, look around you.”

–Leo Tolstoy

*Dolly Parton, “Travelin’ Through”

8 Comments

September 21, 2020

We thine unworthy servants

by chuckofish

This is a picture of pure joy (accompanied by a lot of screaming.)

I’ve been trying to think (once again) of all the things for which I give my “most humble and hearty thanks” and they are, indeed, many.

Besides the obvious and deeply felt ones like my family, no one being on chemotherapy, having a roof over my head and food on the table (our creation, preservation, and all the blessings of this life)…

I would add, my silver hair.

Lottie says, “Why can’t we go inside? I’m hoooooooot.”

I am so grateful my hair grew back (and some semblance of my eyebrows) and I am happy to be silver-haired and looking my age.

I am thankful for God’s green earth and all the weird and wonderful creatures that inhabit it.

According to this Woolly Worm on the driveway and the Farmer’s Almanac, it should be a mild winter here in my neck of the flyover woods.

I am happy the weather is cooling off and fall will be here soon. Fall is a favorite season. I always loved going back to school. Going back to school when classes are online, is not the same, but, nevertheless, we thank God for the opportunity to do so. Anyway, I have opened up some windows and sleeping has been very nice.

I am also grateful for being able to hop in my Cooper and take a drive when I am going beserk from being home all. the. time.

The OM has filled my gas tank twice in the last six months. No, I have not driven much–but on Sunday I drove to Lowe’s and bought some new indoor plants. We do what we have to do.

So we beseech thee, give us that due sense of all thy mercies, that our hearts may be unfeignedly thankful; and that we show forth thy praise, not only with our lips, but in our lives, by giving up our selves to thy service, and by walking before thee in holiness and righteousness all our days.

And this was a surprise, but not a surprise.

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (Ephesians 4:31-32)

8 Comments

September 15, 2020

“Hard pressed on every side”*

by chuckofish

Monday was a crazy day; Mondays usually are, right?

But I smiled whenever I thought of the wee laddie starting to play soccer.

Today on the Episcopal calendar of saints we recognize the Rev. James Chisholm and his selfless example during an aggressive epidemic of Yellow Fever which ravaged Portsmouth, Virginia in 1855.

Many of the wealthy residents—including physicians and clergy—fled, leaving many citizens of Portsmouth without medical care, even without food and clean water. The Reverend James Chisholm, first rector of St. John’s, sent his sons away (his wife having died 7 months earlier) but remained in Portsmouth to care for the poor and the sick. Exhausted by his efforts, Chisholm contracted Yellow Fever and died in the Portsmouth Naval Hospital.

Merciful God, who didst call thy priest James Chisholm to sacrifice his life while working amid great suffering and death: Help us, like him, to live by the faith we profess, following in the footsteps of Jesus Christ our Lord; who with the Father and the Holy Spirit liveth and reigneth, one God, in glory everlasting. Amen.

These movies –“Four diverting, optimistic and cool retro classics from Hollywood’s Golden Age”–look like good ones to check out. I am definitely going to find the Mr. Belvedere movie.

I thought this article made some good points.

And, hello, who wants to try these?! Well, maybe without the vodka, thank you.

Happy Tuesday!

*”We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” (2 Corinthians 4:8-9)

4 Comments

March 11, 2019

Such as do stand

by chuckofish

Sunday was the first Sunday in Lent so we read The Great Litany–Rite I, which I love. It is sure to knock some sense into us, right? One can only hope.

The readings were excellent…

“The word is near you, on your lips and in your heart” (that is, the word of faith that we proclaim); ⁹because if you confess with your lips that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. ¹⁰For one believes with the heart and so is justified, and one confesses with the mouth and so is saved. ¹¹The scripture says, “No one who believes in him will be put to shame.” ¹²For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; the same Lord is Lord of all and is generous to all who call on him. ¹³For, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:8b–13)

…later in the chapter Paul makes it clear that “…faith comes from what is heard, and what is heard comes through the word of Christ.” Context is everything.

The Gospel was Jesus being tempted by Satan. The rector’s sermon was the usual hodge-podge of quotes and stories, but he did make his point that we are not helpless against temptation. I don’t think he mentioned the word sin, but c’est l’église aujourd’hui.

Screen Shot 2019-03-10 at 12.57.38 PM.png

Besides going to church, I went to several estate sales, but didn’t find much. Just this little sterling picture frame…

I went to Target as well, and it was jammed. I got out of there pretty darn fast. Then I straightened my house and puttered around. The usual.

The OM and I watched a couple of movies including McQ (1974) with John Wayne, a fish out of water playing a police detective on a personal mission in Seattle. I enjoyed it a lot even though the Duke folding himself into a Firebird is more like James Garner in The Rockford Files than Steve McQueen in Bullitt. He looked pretty uncomfortable.

Screen Shot 2019-03-10 at 1.39.44 PM.png

We also watched Get Carter (1971) with Michael Caine as a London gangster, who is trying to figure out who killed his brother in his hometown in the north of England. It is very gritty and violent and there is quite a bit of unsavory sex. If your idea of the English is purely based on watching Downton Abbey and reading Jane Austen books, this movie will cure you of that delusion forever.

Screen Shot 2019-03-10 at 1.44.10 PM.png

Guy Ritchie must have been influenced by this film, because it reminded me of all his movies. Anyway, I have to say I liked it, especially Michael Caine as the sociopath with a glimmer of character. He never looked handsomer.

Watching these two movies back to back reminded me of the fact that Michael Caine visited John Wayne many times in the hospital when he was dying in 1979. Caine would walk him up and down the hall and talk to him. They liked each other.

The wee babes came over for dinner with the boy on Sunday night. The wee laddie has glasses now to help fix his eye which still wanders a bit.

Now all the kids in preschool will want them.

We had a lot of fun watching the squirrels cavort in the front yard. Better than television!

Screen Shot 2019-03-11 at 6.39.34 AM.png

And now a new and busy week dawns. I’ll take it one day at a time.

6 Comments

February 27, 2019

“When glorie swells the heart”*

by chuckofish

Can you believe that a week from today is Ash Wednesday? Where did February go? I mean really.

Well, today George Herbert (1593 – 1633) is commemorated on the calendar of saints throughout the Anglican Communion.

Screen Shot 2019-02-26 at 1.34.09 PM.png

“The Herbert Niche” at Salisbury Cathedral

Herbert wrote poetry in English, Latin and Greek. Shortly before his death, he sent the manuscript of The Temple to Nicholas Ferrar, the founder of a semi-monastic Anglican religious community at Little Gidding, reportedly telling him to publish the poems if he thought they might “turn to the advantage of any dejected poor soul”, otherwise to burn them. Thanks to Ferrar, all of Herbert’s English poems were published in The Temple: Sacred Poems and Private Ejaculations, with a preface by Ferrar, shortly after his death in 1633. The book went through eight editions by 1690.

Here’s one of his most famous poems, “The Flower”.

How fresh, oh Lord, how sweet and clean

Are thy returns! even as the flowers in spring;

         To which, besides their own demean,

The late-past frosts tributes of pleasure bring.

                      Grief melts away

                      Like snow in May,

         As if there were no such cold thing.

         Who would have thought my shriveled heart

Could have recovered greenness? It was gone

         Quite underground; as flowers depart

To see their mother-root, when they have blown,

                      Where they together

                      All the hard weather,

         Dead to the world, keep house unknown.

         These are thy wonders, Lord of power,

Killing and quickening, bringing down to hell

         And up to heaven in an hour;

Making a chiming of a passing-bell.

                      We say amiss

                      This or that is:

         Thy word is all, if we could spell.

         Oh that I once past changing were,

Fast in thy Paradise, where no flower can wither!

         Many a spring I shoot up fair,

Offering at heaven, growing and groaning thither;

                      Nor doth my flower

                      Want a spring shower,

         My sins and I joining together.

         But while I grow in a straight line,

Still upwards bent, as if heaven were mine own,

         Thy anger comes, and I decline:

What frost to that? what pole is not the zone

                      Where all things burn,

                      When thou dost turn,

         And the least frown of thine is shown?

         And now in age I bud again,

After so many deaths I live and write;

         I once more smell the dew and rain,

And relish versing. Oh, my only light,

                      It cannot be

                      That I am he

         On whom thy tempests fell all night.

         These are thy wonders, Lord of love,

To make us see we are but flowers that glide;

         Which when we once can find and prove,

Thou hast a garden for us where to bide;

                      Who would be more,

                      Swelling through store,

         Forfeit their Paradise by their pride.

He’s pretty great, don’t you think?

*Herbert, from “The Pearl”

2 Comments

January 7, 2019

“As with gladness men of old did the guiding star behold…

by chuckofish

…as with joy they hailed its light, leading onward, beaming bright;

so, most gracious Lord, may we evermore be led to thee.”*

As you know, yesterday was the feast of the Epiphany. We got to sing “We Three Kings” in church and the Gospel lesson was the story of the Three Wise Men. The rector preached on the question, “What is it that you are seeking?” It is an important question to ask yourself.

Earlier in the weekend I went to an estate sale and bought a few books and a silver tray. I rescued some old lustreware plates, the kind that no one wants these days–$2 for four plates!

I am not “seeking” more old things per se, but sometimes they are thrust upon me.

After that, I cleaned up my office, throwing away and/or recycling a lot of paper that builds up over the year. I did a lot of straightening up and filing. And the OM helped me take down the outside Christmas lights.

Then the wee babes came over on Sunday night to celebrate their mommy’s birthday

with meatloaf and ice cream cake.

Hello, Pan Am?

Of course, the babes found all the things I had put away. They love to pull books off the shelves. That is their duty as two-year-olds.The wee laddie is really into Jung.

Then we watched Three Godfathers (1948) as is our tradition on Epiphany. It is a great tradition because the film is so great.

Screen Shot 2019-01-06 at 2.01.04 PM.png

There were three wise men, Bob, and I’m one of ’em.

I especially noticed how really great it is as I had just watched Gunfight at the OK Corral (1957) the night before. The contrast is striking! Okay, I may have thought this VistaVision drama was great as a child…the song as sung by Frankie Laine is stirring…but the movie–direction, acting, screenplay–is terrible. It is one of those westerns that takes itself very seriously, way too seriously. But what is it saying? That is never clear. Burt Lancaster (Wyatt Earp) plays the marshall as a super-straight-laced, duty-bound good guy who is just boring.

Screen Shot 2019-01-06 at 1.41.09 PM.png

Mustn’t react to fiery redhead, Wyatt. That would be wrong.

On the other hand, Kurt Douglas (Doc Holiday) chews the scenery unashamedly in search of a motive and finds none.

Screen Shot 2019-01-06 at 1.47.56 PM.png

Was Ringo there?

He feels nothing but contempt for his girlfriend, but he is still enraged by her leaving him. What? Does he love her after all? Um, no. His actions clearly suggest otherwise. He is just a jerk, then, right? Both of our heroes are kind of jerks. In fact, the only hint of affection in this movie is between Doc and Wyatt, and we don’t want to go there, right? Well, the only character for whom I felt any sympathy was Jo Van Fleet as Kate, the whore. She is treated badly by everyone, but she still tries to help Doc, whom she loves even though he never appreciates her. Their scenes together at least have a little life in them.

Screen Shot 2019-01-06 at 1.38.00 PM.png

Why don’t you put a rope ’round my neck, and pull it when you want me?

The Clantons are just standard bad guys. All the minor characters are stereotypes played by the B team.

Screen Shot 2019-01-06 at 1.54.07 PM.png It is such a mish-mosh! Really, there is no reason to watch it other than the great song by Dimitri Tiomkin and Ned Washington which you can hear here. While I was watching, I kept thinking about My Darling Clementine (1946) which in my opinion is the only good movie about the OK Corral. There is plenty of motivation in that movie, as well as character development and great acting. There is darkness in this movie and light. There is contrast. There is affection and friendship, loyalty, love. The real stuff.

Screen Shot 2019-01-06 at 1.57.05 PM.png

Walter Brennan as Ike Clanton, abusive father par excellence

[Interesting side note: John Ireland is in both movies as a member of the Clanton gang. File that one away for trivia night.]

So I guess my point is: watch either John Ford movie (Three Godfathers or My Darling Clementine) to see what a great movie is. Skip the 1950’s next-best-thing-to-color television (Gunfight at the OK Corral).

P.S. Yesterday was the 100th anniversary of the death of President Theodore Roosevelt. Join me in a toast!

Screen Shot 2019-01-06 at 3.41.49 PM.png

He’s not afraid.

*Hymn 119

5 Comments

November 13, 2018

“Enlarge these hearts of ours”

by chuckofish

Screen Shot 2018-11-07 at 3.35.13 PM.png

[This Arthur Rackham illustration is perfect for our flyover weather recently–just add snow!]

Today Episcopalians remember Charles Simeon with a Lesser Feast. Simeon was a leader among English evangelical churchmen and was one of the founders of the Church Missionary Society in 1799. According to the historian Thomas Macaulay, Simeon’s “authority and influence… extended from Cambridge to the most remote corners of England … his real sway in the Church was far greater than that of any primate.”

Blessed Lord, the only living and true God,
the Creator and Preserver of all things,
We live by you;
and our whole dependence is upon you,
for all the good that we either have or hope for.
We now desire to bless your name for those mercies,
which in so large a measure
you have generously given us.

Worthy are you, O Lord our God,
to receive all honor and glory,
all thanks and praise,
and love and obedience,
as in the courts of heaven,
so in all the assemblies of your servants upon earth;
for you are great, and you do wondrous things;
you are God alone.

You have looked favorably on your land,
and you have dealt graciously with us.
Instead of giving us over to all the calamities that we feared,
you have multiplied your mercies towards us,
for which we are now called to solemnize a day of thanksgiving.

How sweet and wonderful is it
to recount all the instances of your patience with us, and your blessings to us!

O what shall we render to the Lord for all his benefits!
O let not our hearts be stingy towards you,
whose hand has been so open and generous unto us.
But do enlarge these hearts of ours,
and fill them with more love and thankfulness to the gracious Giver of all our good things.

– Charles Simeon, 1850

It is good (and necessary) to take time to thank God for our blessings.

What are you thankful for?

4 Comments

November 12, 2018

“He hath sounded forth the trumpet that shall never call retreat”*

by chuckofish

It is chilly here in flyover country and there was snow on Friday! Daughter #1 drove home buffeted by a wintery wind in time to accompany Carla and me to a 90th birthday party for a church friend–oh boy! Then the three of us went to dinner afterwards and Carla regaled us with the saga of getting rid of a 20 lb. raccoon that had died behind her closet wall. And you thought you had a bad week.

After estate sale-ing on Saturday I dropped daughter #1 off at her football game watch party (Monon Bell) and I caught up on some housework. The wee babes came over that night for tacos and ran us ragged. I cannot imagine anymore how calm and placid it must be with just one toddler!

They love our old-school toys.

Clearly Lottie understands what a rotary phone is for.

Those antennae are endlessly fascinating.

They can now sing Row, Row, Row Your Boat complete with hand movements, although they do have trouble with the “merrily, merrily, merrily” part. Life is but a dream.

After they left, we managed to watch Murder on the Orient Express (1974) without passing out.

I was glad to see that our church made (sort of) a big deal out of Veterans Day for a change. We had two uniformed veterans and an active Air Corpsman participating in the service. We sang the Battle Hymn of the Republic. The rector talked about the 100th anniversary of the armistice in his sermon and announced that the three memorial plaques, which had been taken down several years ago during a renovation, had been re-hung last week. I was glad to hear it, since I had just been thinking it was time to nag him about it again.

Two young men from Grace Church died in the Argonne Forest and one died of wounds suffered there a month later in the U.S. Eight men from Grace died in WWII. I was very happy to see the plaques back in a prominent place where they belong. Lest we forget.

After church daughter #1 headed back to mid-MO and the OM and I went to see our friend Eleanor in the matinee (i.e. senior citizen show) of the Kirkwood Theatre Guild production of Lord Arthur Savile’s Crime, a “delightful satire” which promised to “keep us laughing.” Guess what? Well, I didn’t fall asleep.

I have a Big Week coming up with 2 big events, multiple meetings, and Marilynne Robinson is visiting my flyover university. Yikes. Take a deep breath. Have a good one.

*Battle Hymn of the Republic

5 Comments

September 18, 2018

Under the surface

by chuckofish

“That’s the strangest thing about this life, about being in the ministry. People change the subject when they see you coming. And then sometimes those very same people come into your study and tell you the most remarkable things. There’s a lot under the surface of life, everyone knows that. A lot of malice and dread and guilt, and so much loneliness, where you wouldn’t really expect to find it, either.”

–Marilynne Robinson, Gilead

Screen Shot 2018-09-17 at 9.18.57 AM.png

Good luck and vaya con dios, Michael.

“Had he, during the course of his ministry, changed a single life? He recalled the words of a woman overheard when he was leaving his last parish. ‘Father Martin is a priest of whom no one ever speaks ill.’ It seemed to him now the most damning of indictments.”

–P.D. James, Death in Holy Orders

“Let the preacher tell the truth. Let him make audible the silence of the news of the world with the sound turned off so that in the silence we can hear the tragic truth of the Gospel, which is that the world where God is absent is a dark and echoing emptiness; and the comic truth of the Gospel, which is that it is into the depths of his absence that God makes himself present in such unlikely ways and to such unlikely people that old Sarah and Abraham and maybe when the time comes even Pilate and Job and Lear and Henry Ward Beecher and you and I laugh till the tears run down our cheeks. And finally let him preach this overwhelming of tragedy by comedy, of darkness by light, of the ordinary by the extraordinary, as the tale that is too good not to be true because to dismiss it as untrue is to dismiss along with it that catch of the breath, that beat and lifting of the heart near to or even accompanied by tears, which I believe is the deepest intuition of truth that we have.”

― Frederick Buechner, Telling the Truth: The Gospel as Tragedy, Comedy and Fairy Tale

2 Comments

Tag: Episcopal Church

by chuckofish

by chuckofish

by chuckofish

by chuckofish

by chuckofish

by chuckofish

by chuckofish

by chuckofish

by chuckofish

by chuckofish