dual personalities

December 18, 2023

“O Daughter of Zion, shout aloud”*

by chuckofish

How was your weekend? Ours was dark and gloomy and rainy, but full of festive seasonal fun nevertheless.

We went to the Christmas concert Friday night–a packed house of Presbyterians, plus a few random Episcopalians I recognized and even a few Jewish Messiah lovers. I enjoyed it very much, but didn’t get home until 10 p.m.–way past my usual bedtime!

On Saturday I went to the funeral of an old 99-year-old friend at my old church. Shirley was quite the gal–a lifelong Episcopalian, Republican and Cardinals fan who went to spring training in Florida every year. She was also a professional woman who had enjoyed quite a long and successful career. The former rector came from Florida to speak along with the former President Pro Tem of the Missouri State Senate. He told the story of how Shirley was sad when she gave up her season tickets to the Cardinals at age 97, but that she had to admit that watching the games on her daughter’s big screen tv had its benefits–namely being able to see Nolan Arenado, “the most beautiful man ever,” up close and personal.

The service was 100% Rite I, but the interim rector kept lapsing into Rite II. C’est la vie. The lay readers were good, which would have pleased Shirley. She had been one herself for decades. I always felt so validated when she gave me a thumbs up after I read. The church was almost full–which said quite a lot about 99-year-old Shirley–but the singing was weak. Shirley, I daresay, is well out of the Episcopal Church and in heaven now.

For I know that my Redeemer lives,
And He shall stand at last on the earth;
And after my skin is destroyed, this I know,
That in my flesh I shall see God,
Whom I shall see for myself,
And my eyes shall behold, and not another.

–Job 19:25-27

After Mr. Smith went to the spa for his shampoo, daughter #1 came over and helped me decorate the tree.

We also watched the 1951 A Christmas Carol–the best version in my not so humble opinion.

This scene always makes me cry: “You’ve made Fred so happy!”

The boy was in Kansas City with his family all weekend, so it was just the OM and I at church and a quiet Sunday afternoon.

Also, I did want to wish a happy birthday to my dual personality. Happy Birthday, sweet sister of mine!

I hope someone is cooking you a nice dinner and that my present arrived in time for you to open it today. I hope you watch a good movie, maybe Captain Blood (1935) or How to Steal a Million (1966). I will be toasting Fizzy Fuzz, Pompey, Pete, and Robert Preston!

Also, this meme made me LOL:

P.S. Many thanks to whoever sent the fruitcake from Texas–there was no card!

*Zechariah 9:9

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December 15, 2023

“From now on call me Velvet Thunder”

by chuckofish

Ten days til Christmas! This weekend we will decorate our tree which the boy kindly set up in its stand. We’re movin’ now.

Tonight we are going to the Christmas concert at Central Presbyterian Church, which daughter #1 attends. The program includes the first part of Handel’s Messiah and a variety of Christmas carols. I am really looking forward to it.

Tomorrow is the 250th anniversary of the Boston Tea party! On December 17, 1773, John Adams wrote, “Last night, three cargoes of tea were emptied into the Harbour. This is the grandest event which has ever yet happened since the controversy with Britain opened!” He also wrote, “The people should never rise without doing something to be remembered, something notable, and striking. The destruction of the tea is so bold, so daring, so firm, intrepid, and inflexible, and it must have so important consequences, and so lasting, that I can’t but consider it as an epocha in history.”

Don’t forget to celebrate appropriately.

In other news, we were saddened to hear that Andre Braugher, who starred as Captain Raymond Holt in Brooklyn Nine-Nine, has died. Nobody could say “punk” like Captain Holt. Of course, someone did a YouTube tribute and it’s pretty good even though the compilation does not include Cheddar:

Rest in peace, Andre. Love you, Captain.

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December 14, 2023

With angelic host proclaim*

by chuckofish

Hello from daughter #2!

It should come as no surprise that I am enjoying the Christmas season with the girls. At 3.5 years old, Katie has been very invested in our decorations, Christmas stories, beloved movies, and other traditions. She makes everything more special, from buying an inexpensive wreath at the grocery store to unpacking generations-old ornaments. This year, she even picked out a few gifts and helped me pen the accompanying cards. (We discussed that, because it’s the thought that counts, it helps to write a thoughtful message about what you chose.)

For her part, Ida has enjoyed Christmas music and always amuses us with her dance moves, which center in her hips. She can’t help but dance, no matter how busy she is with something else (crawling, cruising, jail-breaking, wreaking general havoc). When we watched White Christmas, she stopped in her literal tracks when Bing Crosby sang his first note. (I have since heard multiple other accounts of children doing this!) Admittedly, she is still a big fan of The Beach Boys. (You may recall that when she was a wee babe, DN sang “Surfin’ I-D-A” to her, to much delight.)

With an older toddler, we have also been answering a lot of questions about Christmas. Some regard deeper themes — when learning “Hark! the Herald Angels Sing,”* Katie asked, “Why do they say newborn king and not newborn baby?”

Others, not so much. At dinner:

Katie: “Mom, will you tell me to eeeeat, Katie, eat?”
Me: “Do you mean like Mrs. Claus says?” (I recognized the line from Rudolph.)
Katie: “Yes.”
Me: “Eeeat, Katie, eat!”
Katie: “Can you say it again but not with that tone?”

Gee whiz. This exchange then prompted a conversation about why Santa needs a round belly in the first place. Like a bowl full of jelly? — what is jelly? I mean, I’m really with her.

While we are on the topic of toddler philosophy, I’ll leave you with one more anecdote. As we plan our move to Illinois, we are trying to prepare Katie for big changes. Accordingly, she has many questions. The other night, she asked, “Will we take Ida’s walker to Illinois?” We said, yes, we will take all of our things to Illinois. “How?” (Great question.) We explained that we will put everything in a big, big truck. “Why not 3 or 4 small trucks?”

Indeed.

*Hark! the Herald Angels Sing, lyrics by Charles Wesley, 1739

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December 13, 2023

Let nothing you dismay

by chuckofish

“Oh! But he was a tight-fisted hand at the grindstone, Scrooge! a squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous, old sinner! Hard and sharp as flint, from which no steel had ever struck out generous fire; secret, and self-contained, and solitary as an oyster.”

–A Christmas Carol by Charles DIckens

Are you feeling a little like our friend Mr. Scrooge? Here’s a good message from the late, great R.C. Sproul: “Every generation has its abundance of Scrooges. The church is full of them. We hear endless complaints of commercialism. We are constantly told to put Christ back into Christmas. We hear that the tradition of Santa Claus is a sacrilege. We listen to those acquainted with history murmur that Christmas isn’t biblical…All this carping is but a modern dose of Scroogeism, our own sanctimonious profanation of the holy.”

So lighten up. Enjoy the season! Spread some cheer! Write some end-of-the-year checks to the Shriners and the Salvation Army and your local Christian radio station. Put some paper money in the red kettle at the grocery store. You’ll be glad you did.

And I hope you enjoy this rendition of God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen, which is one of the oldest Christmas carols, originating in 16th-century England. The earliest known printed edition was published in 1760.

God rest ye merry gentlemen
Let nothing you dismay
For Jesus Christ our Saviour
Was born on Christmas Day
To save us all from Satan’s pow’r
When we were gone astray
O tidings of comfort and joy
Comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

From God our Heavenly Father
A blessed Angel came;
And unto certain shepherds
Brought tidings of the same,
How that in Bethlehem was born
The Son of God by Name.
O tidings of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

The shepherds at those tidings
Rejoiced much in mind,
And left their flocks a-feeding
In tempest, storm and wind,
And went to Bethlehem straightway
The Son of God to find.
O tidings of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

But when to Bethlehem they came,
Whereat this infant lay,
They found Him in a manger,
Where oxen feed on hay;
His Mother Mary kneeling down,
Unto the Lord did pray.
O tidings of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

Now to the Lord sing praises,
All you within this place,
And with true love and brotherhood
Each other now embrace;
This holy tide of Christmas
All other doth efface.
O tidings of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy.

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December 12, 2023

Comfort, comfort my people*

by chuckofish

I hinted about something awhile ago and now I think it is official and okay for me to let you know that DN has been offered/accepted a job at the University of Illinois–Champaign-Urbana campus and that he and daughter #2’s little family will be moving there in the new year!

It is a mere 181 miles from St. Louis! We are so excited and happy and grateful.

Well done, Nate!

In other news, the world continues to go to hell in a hand-basket. In the meantime here are some excellent and timely reads on:

The desecration of man;

Why the HR mindset can’t condemn genocide;

and, yes, the moral rot starts at the top.

Well, as Anne says, in order “to sleep at night, and then to get through the day without descending into madness, I have to keep [current] events as they unfold very much at the periphery and not dwell on what I do see for very long. I have to keep moving, lest I be swept away on a tide of anxiety and horror.”

So look up, see the light, hug your family, read your Bible, go to church, and keep praying.

And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth. (John 1:14)

*Isaiah 40:1

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December 11, 2023

Veni emmanuel

by chuckofish

Another super busy weekend with a variety of events, several of which involved getting dressed up and socializing with people. But the weekend was dominated by the wee twins’ 7th birthday and their birthday party. Their parents rented one of the small movie theaters at the Galleria and invited 20 kids to watch Aladdin (1992) in their pajamas.

They got popcorn, candy and a drink and, of course, a special cookie.

I must say it was a pretty fun party. When Jasmine and Aladdin go on their magic carpet ride and sing “A Whole New World” all the girls in the back row, led by Lottie, burst into song and sang along. Several of the boys (down in front) got annoyed and said, “Be QUIET!” I was amused–funnily enough the boys were better behaved than the girls. I also enjoyed the movie–Robin Williams knocks it out of the ballpark. I had forgotten that it was the highest grossing film of 1992!

Later in the day the twins also came over to our house for a more sedate birthday gathering with a cookie cake and a few presents to open.

We also managed to go to church twice–once on Sunday morning and once Sunday evening for Lessons & Carols followed by a congregational meeting to vote for our senior pastor candidate. It was a full house and we blew the roof off singing–this congregation loves to sing! And we voted in the new pastor!

Among other Advent standards, we sang O Come, O Come, Emmanuel which I always associate with my earliest pageant experience at my school in kindergarten. We sang it in the dark with our little candle/flashlights. It made quite an impression. That old 13th century Plainsong is so sad and eery sounding. I never really understood the lyrics until recently though.

O come, Thou Rod of Jesse, free
Thine own from Satan’s tyranny;
From depths of hell Thy people save,
And give them victory o’er the grave.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.

There’s actually a whole lot I understand now that I did not before. I am so grateful for my new church. I am so grateful for Tim Keller and R.C. Sproul and John MacArthur and John Piper for pointing me in the right direction and for encouraging me to find a good church!

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December 8, 2023

The soul in paraphrase

by chuckofish

Maybe nobody wants to hear any more about prayer, but here’s a great poem by George Herbert who, you will recall, was a poet and Anglican priest writing in the seventeenth century.

Prayer the church’s banquet, angel’s age,
God’s breath in man returning to his birth,
The soul in paraphrase, heart in pilgrimage,
The Christian plummet sounding heav’n and earth
Engine against th’ Almighty, sinner’s tow’r,
Reversed thunder, Christ-side-piercing spear,
The six-days world transposing in an hour,
A kind of tune, which all things hear and fear;
Softness, and peace, and joy, and love, and bliss,
Exalted manna, gladness of the best,
Heaven in ordinary, man well drest,
The milky way, the bird of Paradise,
Church-bells beyond the stars heard, the soul’s blood,
The land of spices; something understood.

“Prayer (1)” by George Herbert
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December 7, 2023

Thy will be done

by chuckofish

My mother was a very private person. She would never have asked anyone to pray for her. In fact, she kind of felt that she shouldn’t even bother God with her problems. She should deal with them herself. This is bad, non-biblical theology and it took me years to overcome my own reluctance to ask for help.

When my son had cancer, however, I asked everyone I knew to pray for him–Protestants, Catholics and Jews. He was on multiple prayer lists all over town. When his twins were born at 27 weeks I again went begging for prayers. When they pulled through, a devout Catholic friend who had been praying said it was a miracle, but the look on her face said she couldn’t quite believe it. Well, believe it.

Then when I had cancer the same Protestants, Catholics and Jews prayed for me. It helped me enormously knowing these friends were holding me up in prayer.

They prayed for daughter #1 when she wanted to move back to Missouri and again when she was looking for a new job a year ago. We have been praying for daughter #2 and her family to move closer to us and I am confident we shall see that come to fruition in the not-too-distant future. “The right job at the right time. Thy will be done,” as one friend said.

Life is hard. Things go wrong—in life and in love and in business and in friendship and in health and in all the other ways that life can go wrong. When they do, it is important not to bottle up your stress like my mother did. Share it with God. Share it with your Bible Study Group, your pastor, your friends.

I am no prayer warrior, but I know some women who are. Indeed, Calvinists are great ones for prayer. And they do not pray from a book. I am working on it.

Never forget that God is active, present, and involved in your life. He is always working for the good of those who love him. 

Then He spoke a parable to them, that men always ought to pray and not lose heart, 2 saying: “There was in a certain city a judge who did not fear God nor regard man. 3 Now there was a widow in that city; and she came to him, saying, ‘Get justice for me from my adversary.’ 4 And he would not for a while; but afterward he said within himself, ‘Though I do not fear God nor regard man, 5 yet because this widow troubles me I will avenge her, lest by her continual coming she weary me.’ ”

6 Then the Lord said, “Hear what the unjust judge said. 7 And shall God not avenge His own elect who cry out day and night to Him, though He bears long with them? 8 I tell you that He will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will He really find faith on the earth?”

Luke 18:1-8

Keep praying. Pray in the good times as well as the bad. As Corrie Ten Boom said, “Is prayer your steering wheel or your spare tire?”

(The painting is The Prayer before Meal, before 1740, by Jean-Baptiste-Siméon Chardin.)

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December 6, 2023

A partridge in a pear tree

by chuckofish

It is that time of year when everything is in a state of chaos, most particularly my office. Good grief, Charlie Brown! Although you cannot tell, I am making progress. I mailed two out-of-town packages and wrote my Christmas letter!

In other news, today is the birthday of the great character actress Agnes Moorehead (1900-1974). The daughter of a Presbyterian minister, she grew up in St. Louis where as a child she was in the chorus of the MUNY Opera! At the insistence of her father she graduated from college before heading to the stage. During her long and illustrious career she was nominated for an Academy Award four times and an Emmy Award seven times, winning once for The Wild, Wild West of all things. Here she is in Orson Welles’ The Magnificent Ambersons (1942):

I remember going with my mother and sister to see her at the Fox Theatre in the early 1970s when she reprised her role in Don Juan in Hell on tour, with an all-star cast that featured Edward Mulhare, Ricardo Montalban and Paul Henreid. (I would have sworn it was Myrna Loy, but Wikipedia says it was Agnes Moorehead.) I just remember Ricardo Montalban prompting the forgetful Edward Mulhare throughout the play. Well, she was a great actress who was in a lot of good movies. She certainly was the best thing about Bewitched.

And remember this episode from season five of The Mary Tyler Moore Show? All the coworkers are fed up and frustrated with each other, and Sue Ann forces the crew into a rendition of The 12 Days of Christmas.

We’ve all been there, right? So keep your chin up, smile, and remember that Jesus is the reason for the season.

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December 5, 2023

The strong gales of the Spirit

by chuckofish

As you know my Bible reading plan this year was the Navigators 5x5x5 New Testament reading plan. It has been an easier plan than reading the entire Bible and I have enjoyed concentrating on the NT.

Right now I am reading Revelation, which is looking awfully relevant these days.

Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me. (Rev. 3:20)

For next year, I have a new plan and a new Bible–the ESV Chronological Bible.

I will read through scripture in historical order–from Genesis to Revelation–through the eight eras of the Bible in the order the events occurred.

Do you have a reading plan for 2024? Here’s a list of ones you can download. Times a-wastin’! January will be here before you know it.

After my morning scripture reading, I read a prayer from The Valley of Vision, a collection of Puritan prayers and devotions, edited by Arthur Bennett. I really love these prayers and I highly recommend the book. You might want to ask Santa to bring you a copy for Christmas. (POV: Don’t buy anything for yourself now–someone may already be planning to give it to you for Christmas!)

O Lord, in prayer I launch far out into the eternal world, and on that broad ocean my soul triumphs over all evils on the shores of mortality. Time, with its gay amusements and cruel disappointments never appears so inconsiderate as then.

In prayer I see myself as nothing; I find my heart going after Thee with intensity, and long with vehement thirst to live to Thee. Blessed be the strong gales of the Spirit that speed me on my way to the New Jerusalem.

In prayer all things here below vanish, and nothing seems important but holiness of heart and the salvation of others.

In prayer all my worldly cares, fears, anxieties disappear, and are of as little significance as a puff of wind.

In prayer my soul inwardly exults with lively thoughts at what Thou art doing for Thy church, and I long that Thou shouldest get Thyself a great name from sinners returning to Zion.

In prayer I am lifted above the frowns and flatteries of life, and taste heavenly joys; entering into the eternal world I can give myself to Thee with all my heart, to be Thine for ever.

In prayer I can place all my concerns in Thy hands, to be entirely at Thy disposal, having no will or interest of my own.

In prayer I can intercede for my friends, ministers, sinners, the church, Thy kingdom to come, with greatest freedom, ardent hopes, as a son to his father, as a lover to the beloved.

Help me to be all prayer and never to cease praying.

(“In Prayer”)

P.S. The Presbyterian Church in America (PCA) celebrated its 50th anniversary on December 4, 2023. Here are four things I see in the PCA for which I give thanks.

(The painting is The Light of the World (1851-54) by William Holman Hunt.)

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