Weekend | dual personalities

February 18, 2020

“January cold and desolate; February dripping wet”*

by chuckofish

The OM and I had a fun trip to Jefferson City last weekend. We took the “River Runner” train after work on Friday. The next morning daughter #1 drove us to Columbia where we checked out the new State Historical Society of Missouri building…

Screen Shot 2020-02-17 at 11.05.59 AM.png

(The sky was grey and overcast when we visited and there was a much more brutalist feel to the building than in this photo.)

The museum inside was small but very nice with some good paintings and drawings by George Caleb Bingham and Thomas Hart Benton.

It was pretty cool. We had lunch in a hip, Brooklyn-esque restaurant and then headed home to Jeff City where we dropped off the OM at daughter # 1’s charming apartment…

…so that we could do a little mid-MO shopping. After a late afternoon glass of wine, we hopped on the train and returned to Kirkwood. It was a lovely, hassle-free overnight visit with daughter #1.

On Sunday I went to church and came home and caught up on laundry and vacuuming and got ready for the wee babes’ arrival later in the afternoon. I had bought them little Valentine presents, which turned out to be big hits. The Jumping Bear stacking toy was for Lottie who, as you know, loves to stack, and the Fisher Price Nifty Station Wagon was for the wee laddie who loves all things on wheels.

Screen Shot 2020-02-17 at 8.31.47 PM

Screen Shot 2020-02-17 at 10.49.02 AM

Note that he has taken out the Dad, Mom and dog and put more cars in the “nifty station wagon”…

There’s a whole lot of concentrating going on here…

I was pleased. My choices are ~~seldom~~ not always so successful…

In other news, I forgot to watch the Westminster Dog Show last week. I always got a kick out of it, but I’m afraid it has become a bit of a clown show…

Screen Shot 2020-02-17 at 1.15.24 PM.png That poodle, good grief.

Screen Shot 2020-02-17 at 2.24.59 PM.png

Here’s to the rest of the week! Maybe the sun will come out!

*Christina Rossetti, “The Months”

6 Comments

February 14, 2020

A bushel and a peck

by chuckofish

Screen Shot 2020-02-11 at 9.26.39 PM.png

Well, I have had a busy week! I even gave a talk to 150 people and lived through it. “I came to you in weakness and in fear and in much trembling,” wrote Paul to the Corinthians. “And my speech and my proclamation were not in words of wisdom.” This is always how I feel, but according to people in attendance, I did not embarrass myself.

I also went to an event after work for a friend who is running for City Council. Another thing I haven’t done in a long time–go out after work!

Later today, after work, the OM and I are taking the River Runner Amtrak train to Jefferson City.

Screen Shot 2020-02-13 at 11.36.05 AM.png We’ll stay with daughter #1 and come home on the train on Saturday evening. Wild and crazy I know!

On Sunday I hope the wee babes will come over with their parents for an old-fashioned Valentine’s Day party like the ones daughter #2 alluded to in her post yesterday.

The wee babes have been wearing Valentine outfits all week.

Lottie is one of only a couple of girls in a class full of boys, so odds are she will make out like a bandit in the Valentine lottery.

The wee laddie has a coterie of older girls (5 year olds!) who follow him around and tell him he’s cute. They can’t keep their hands off him. The acorn didn’t fall too far from the tree…

Love is in the air.

Anyway, have a good weekend! Watch a good romantic movie!

dive for dreams

or a slogan may topple you

(trees are their roots

and wind is wind)

trust your heart

if the seas catch fire

(and live by love

though the stars walk backward)

honor the past

but welcome the future

(and dance your death

away at this wedding)

never mind a world

with its villains or heroes

(for god likes girls

and tomorrow and the earth)

–e.e. cummings

“Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.” (1 John 4:7-10)

4 Comments

February 4, 2020

A little fishing village where there are no phones

by chuckofish

The name of the author is the first to go
followed obediently by the title, the plot,
the heartbreaking conclusion, the entire novel
which suddenly becomes one you have never read,
never even heard of,

as if, one by one, the memories you used to harbor
decided to retire to the southern hemisphere of the brain,
to a little fishing village where there are no phones.

Long ago you kissed the names of the nine Muses goodbye
and watched the quadratic equation pack its bag,
and even now as you memorize the order of the planets,

something else is slipping away, a state flower perhaps,
the address of an uncle, the capital of Paraguay.

Whatever it is you are struggling to remember
it is not poised on the tip of your tongue,
not even lurking in some obscure corner of your spleen.

It has floated away down a dark mythological river
whose name begins with an L as far as you can recall,

well on your own way to oblivion where you will join those
who have even forgotten how to swim and how to ride a bicycle.

No wonder you rise in the middle of the night
to look up the date of a famous battle in a book on war.
No wonder the moon in the window seems to have drifted
out of a love poem that you used to know by heart.

–Billy Collins

Older readers will relate to this poem. I certainly do. Billy Collins wrote it when he was 58 and he is still going strong twenty years later, so take heart, right?

Screen Shot 2020-02-03 at 1.00.26 PM.png

In other news, my vestry retreat went well. It always helps when half the group stops at the Hofbrauhaus in Belleville, Illinois for happy hour on the way to the retreat. (This is an Episcopal Church vestry after all.)

Screen Shot 2020-02-03 at 1.18.03 PM.png

I got home in time on Saturday to relax and recover, and on Sunday I got my laundry/ chores/puttering done. But I could definitely have used another day off. The wee babes came over for dinner with their parents and we had a merry time. At one point we were discussing the fact that the governor was in Florida for the Super Bowl and Lottie told me that her Noni and Papa (the other grandparents) were in Florida. I said, yes, I know. There are a lot of people in Florida. She looked at me and repeated what she had said, definitely with a tone.

I am a blockhead.

We did not watch the Super Bowl. Instead, after everyone had gone home, the OM and I watched The Matrix (1999) at the recommendation of the boy. I had never seen it! I enjoyed it, although I cannot say I really understood what was going on most of the time. Screen Shot 2020-02-03 at 1.43.34 PM.png Well, I am trying to enjoy the warm spell we are experiencing until the next wintry mix assails us on Wednesday. Par for the course in flyover country!

Keep re-reading those books you’ve forgotten.

“We deliberately forget because forgetting is a blessing. On both an emotional level and a spiritual level, forgetting is a natural part of the human experience and a natural function of the human brain. It is a feature, not a bug, one that saves us from being owned by our memories. Can a world that never forgets be a world that truly forgives?”
― Tim Challies, The Next Story: Life and Faith after the Digital Explosion

Painting by Jacob D. Wagner (American, 1852-1898)

6 Comments

January 24, 2020

Is it Friday yet?

by chuckofish

Screen Shot 2020-01-23 at 5.47.32 PM.png

And the robin flew

Into the air, the air,

The white mist through;

And small and rare

The night-frost fell

Into the calm and misty dell.

And the dusk gathered low,

And the silver moon and stars

On the frozen snow

Drew taper bars,

Kindled winking fires In the hooded briers.

And the sprawling Bear

Growled deep in the sky;

And Orion’s hair

Streamed sparkling by:

But the North sighed low,

“Snow, snow, more snow!” –Walter de la Mare

Do you have plans for the weekend? We are going to the annual Elegant Italian Dinner at our church, which, you will recall, is the fundraiser for the youth mission trip. Big Doings. The boy and daughter # 3 are going with us. The wee babes will be in the nursery. If the weather cooperates, daughter #1 will drive in from mid-MO and join us. Since it is an Episcopal church, there will be a cash bar. Good times predicted and one of my first social “outings” in a long time.

In other news, Lottiebelle has continued to build towers…

“The biggest in the world!” with a little help from Daddy

…and the wee laddie continues to improve his driving skills…

And here’s some news you can use:

Screen Shot 2020-01-23 at 8.39.26 PM.png

Plus, I thought that this was real good.

Have a good weekend!

3 Comments

January 14, 2020

“And then one day, I’ll cross the river”*

by chuckofish

It rained, it snowed, it sleeted (a little), so I stayed in most of the weekend. However, I did go to two funerals. The first was to the OM’s Aunt Freida’s at a big Assembly of God church. It was about as far from an Episcopal service as you can get, but it was very nice, and I got choked up several times, especially when singing the two hymns, “Because He Lives” and “It is Well with My Soul”. There were no congregational prayers and only one psalm (the 23rd) which the minister read. The sermon consisted of a lot of scripture passages (of which I approved) woven together and there were “reflections” by two elderly church lady friends who regaled us with stories of Freida. The congregation sat and watched, only rising to sing the two hymns. Lunch followed.

The second memorial service was for a dear friend who was a devout Christian Scientist. The service consisted of a hymn sung by the congregation, scripture passages and quotes by Mary Baker Eddy read by a daughter, a soloist singing “The Lord’s Prayer”, and his adult children singing the 23rd Psalm. At one point people were invited to say a few words about Art–a tribute–spontaneously. College friends from The Principia, students from the Sunday School class he taught for over 40 years, members of his church–even I felt moved to say something. I said that as the mother of an Eagle Scout I know that it is important for a Boy Scout to be cheerful and that Art was a good scout. He embodied the scripture, “This is the day which the Lord has made; let us be glad and rejoice in it.” Indeed, Art was one in a million. Starting off at IBM as a salesman, he had eventually started a fast food restaurant that became a national chain. He was a Boy Scout leader, a world traveler, a fisherman, a singer. He was a facilitator at our flyover institute for many years until his memory failed and he couldn’t do it anymore. He was a much loved man. I do not know much about Christian Scientists, but I was struck by the love that abounded in this assembly and in his family.

So two very different services for two saints.

Speaking of saints, the OM and I watched A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood (2019). It is not a terrible movie, but it is not a good one.

Screen Shot 2020-01-11 at 1.52.12 PM.png

It is badly directed by Marielle Heller in an inappropriately solemn and reverential way. Mr. Rogers is treated as if he were some pocket saint…

Screen Shot 2020-01-11 at 2.37.23 PM.png

…and not the happy-go-lucky, slightly nerdly, but joyful guy he was.

Screen Shot 2020-01-11 at 2.39.12 PM.png

He may have been a saint, but the tone was all wrong. Tom Hanks obviously watched hours of videos, trying to get the mannerisms down and he does, but he has slowed everything down until he comes across like some saint savant. I thought he missed the mark. The fact that Fred Rogers was an ordained Presbyterian minister is never mentioned, but I will give the screenwriter credit for at least mentioning that he read scripture daily and prayed for people by name. They even show him kneeling at his bedside in prayer. But again, this is to demonstrate how different he was from everyone else, and how saintly. The real Mr. Rogers would have scoffed at this.

Furthermore, the movie moves at an excruciatingly slow pace and is never enlivened by any humor. Surely they could have included some funny moments. But scriptwriters and directors these days just do not know how to construct a film. This movie was a fail and it does not surprise me that it is a box office disappointment. [However, I will note that the OM enjoyed this movie and was obviously moved by the story of the journalist and his estranged father–until I ruined it for him by pointing out all the things that were wrong with the movie. So go figure.]

So my weekend was full of saints, but I missed the baptism of this little Episcopalian by the wee laddie’s godfather, because I went to the 8:00 a.m. service.

Screen Shot 2020-01-13 at 4.06.18 PM.png

Do you renounce Satan and all the spiritual forces
of wickedness that rebel against God, Riley Mae?

You can’t have it all.

* “Because He Lives” by Bill and Gloria Gaither

7 Comments

January 10, 2020

Pick a little, talk a little

by chuckofish

Screen Shot 2020-01-09 at 9.05.40 PM.png

I have had a very busy week at work. I got a lot done there, but there’s not much to write about here. So here’s a Wendell Berry poem to ponder.

Love the quick profit, the annual raise,
vacation with pay. Want more
of everything ready-made. Be afraid
to know your neighbors and to die.

And you will have a window in your head.
Not even your future will be a mystery
any more. Your mind will be punched in a card
and shut away in a little drawer.

When they want you to buy something
they will call you. When they want you
to die for profit they will let you know.
So, friends, every day do something
that won’t compute. Love the Lord.
Love the world. Work for nothing.
Take all that you have and be poor.
Love someone who does not deserve it.

Denounce the government and embrace
the flag. Hope to live in that free
republic for which it stands.
Give your approval to all you cannot
understand. Praise ignorance, for what man
has not encountered he has not destroyed.

Ask the questions that have no answers.
Invest in the millenium. Plant sequoias.
Say that your main crop is the forest
that you did not plant,
that you will not live to harvest.

Say that the leaves are harvested
when they have rotted into the mold.
Call that profit. Prophesy such returns.
Put your faith in the two inches of humus
that will build under the trees
every thousand years.

Listen to carrion — put your ear
close, and hear the faint chattering
of the songs that are to come.
Expect the end of the world. Laugh.
Laughter is immeasurable. Be joyful
though you have considered all the facts.
So long as women do not go cheap
for power, please women more than men.

Ask yourself: Will this satisfy
a woman satisfied to bear a child?
Will this disturb the sleep
of a woman near to giving birth?

Go with your love to the fields.
Lie down in the shade. Rest your head
in her lap. Swear allegiance
to what is nighest your thoughts.

As soon as the generals and the politicos
can predict the motions of your mind,
lose it. Leave it as a sign
to mark the false trail, the way
you didn’t go.

Be like the fox
who makes more tracks than necessary,
some in the wrong direction.
Practice resurrection.

Have a good weekend. It is raining here and it is supposed to continue into the weekend, maybe turning to snow at some point. I am sleeping in.

“The Gossips” by Virginia Lee Burton Demetrios, children’s author: wood block print on cloth for the Folly Cove Designers near Gloucester, MA.

6 Comments

January 7, 2020

The thoughts you think

by chuckofish

This made me laugh…

Screen Shot 2020-01-06 at 3.23.57 PM.png

newyorksocialdiary@instagram.com

And I have to agree with this…

Screen Shot 2020-01-05 at 2.24.11 PM.png

vegaslady42@instagram.com

I am not on Facebook or Twitter, but I do have an Instagram account, so I know about wasting time. But as you can see, it is not all a waste of time.

Classes have started up again at my flyover institute. Busy, busy again. Thankfully I got all my Christmas decorations taken down and stored away over the weekend. The OM and the boy even took the extra leaf out of the dining room table and the wee laddie freaked out, screaming that they were breaking the table (“my table”). Who knew he felt so strongly about the table? Life can be very disturbing.

The wee babes are back in school too. It’s good to get back to a normal routine.

And lest we forget:

“When bad news is riding high and despair in fashion, when loud mouths and corruption seem to own center stage, when some keep crying that the country is going to the dogs, remember it’s always been going to the dogs in the eyes of some, and that 90 percent, or more, of the people are good people, generous-hearted, law-abiding, good citizens who get to work on time, do a good job, love their country, pay their taxes, care about their neighbors, care about their children’s education, and believe, rightly, as you do, in the ideals upon which our way of life is founded.”

― David McCullough, The American Spirit: Who We Are and What We Stand For

Yes.

5 Comments

December 31, 2019

“O come, O Bright and Morning Star, and bring us comfort from afar!”*

by chuckofish

Screen Shot 2019-12-29 at 8.03.20 AM.png

Well, we have had a lovely relaxed time, taking it easy over the Christmas holiday. Since daughter #2 and DN left last Friday…

…we have eased into our leisure time, going to lunch at some of our off-the-beaten-track favorites, like the Fiddlehead Fern restaurant…

…taking afternoon naps, followed by a late afternoon glass of wine in front of the fire…

…and watching movies…

Screen Shot 2019-12-30 at 9.41.52 AM.png

On Wednesdays we wear pink.

Screen Shot 2019-12-30 at 9.43.59 AM.png

The OM was in complete and utter hog heaven watching this movie. I really enjoyed it too.

I also went to the funeral of my dear friend Ruby. Daughter #1 kindly drove me to St. Charles, Missouri across the river where we found her Episcopal Church next to the campus of Lindenwood University. It was packed, because, of course, she was a devoted and active member. The service, which she had specified down to the last detail and saved in her safe deposit box, was Rite I and Rite II (the communion) and included her favorite hymns. It was lovely and nearly two hours long. Her ashes were buried afterwards in the memorial garden of the church, but not in a niche–in the ground. We all threw some dirt on top of her ashes (half of which are going to Wyoming) which I had never done before. I found it to be very meaningful.

Ruby was born and raised in the Flint Hills of eastern Kansas and she loved the wide open sky there.

Screen Shot 2019-12-30 at 9.53.57 PM.png

The Flint Hills, photo from National Geographic

She would get choked up talking about it. Several of her hymns reflected that:

The spacious firmament on high,
With all the blue ethereal sky,
And spangled heavens, a shining frame,
Their great Original proclaim.
The unwearied sun from day to day
Does his Creator’s power display,
And publishes to every land
The work of an almighty hand.

–Joseph Addison, hymn #409

Anyway, her funeral was a true reflection of Ruby, which is as it should be. May she rest in peace and rise in glory.

Meanwhile, I was back at work Monday to check on things and go through 150 emails…Today we get ready to celebrate the new year: 2020! Can you believe it? Twenty years into the 21st century!

Then it’s back to the salt mine for real on Thursday. Speaking of salt mines, this made me laugh.

Screen Shot 2019-12-30 at 8.48.36 AM.png

Happy New Year! Make good choices!

Screen Shot 2019-12-30 at 9.48.45 PM.png

*John Mason Neale (1851)

3 Comments

December 17, 2019

Tidings of comfort and joy

by chuckofish

Here are the dual personalities back in 1959–sixty years ago! According to our mother’s penciled notation, the first picture was taken on Christmas Eve. I was dressed like an elf; I probably annoyed my brother.

The snapshot below was taken on Christmas morning. I remember those dresses–they were red with white pinafores.

The tree looks kind of sad, but I’m sure we thought it was beautiful. We had quite a haul from Santa.

I was 3 1/2, our brother was 8 1/2 and my sister had just turned one. Tomorrow is her birthday! We wish her a happy day.

In other news, we had a snow day yesterday. It snowed on Sunday and the weather folk presented dire predictions of ice and snow to come. The OM drove me to MoBap for my radiation treatment at 7:30 on Monday morning and we got there and home just fine. I had decided not to go in to work and it was a good call. It snowed most of the day.

You can hardly tell, but it was really coming down here!

I got out the Christmas tree ornaments in anticipation of the boy coming over tonight to take the tree out of the garage, put it in the stand and hang the lights on it.

I know, these pictures look the same every year. What can I say?

We didn’t get a chance to see the wee babes over the weekend, but they did go to the NICU reunion Christmas party where they got to see Santa. The wee laddie had his doubts…

Screen Shot 2019-12-15 at 5.38.36 PM.png

…but Lottie was cool with it.

Screen Shot 2019-12-16 at 10.48.46 AM.png The boy also sent pictures of the babes frolicking in the snow on their snow day.

“I can’t move my arms!”

Well, that was fun, but here’s hoping MODOT has done its job and we can all get to work today!

I only have three work days ’til I am off for the holidays, and I can’t wait!

8 Comments

December 13, 2019

Dear Santa Claus

by chuckofish

And the Lord will guide you continually,
    and satisfy your desire with good things,
    and make your bones strong;
and you shall be like a watered garden,
    like a spring of water,
    whose waters fail not.

–Isaiah 58:11 (RSV)

Screen Shot 2019-12-10 at 1.31.18 PM.png

What do you want for Christmas? All I want is the usual–for everyone in my family to be happy with the gifts I give them. I would also like my eyebrows and eyelashes to grow back. 😑

By the way, the wee babes turned three on Wednesday!

Screen Shot 2019-12-12 at 1.44.47 PM.png

Screen Shot 2019-12-12 at 1.19.22 PM.png

They are still pretty little, but they’ve come a long way, haven’t they?

Screen Shot 2019-12-12 at 1.22.58 PM.png

One and a half pounds!

They never cease to amaze me.

Yes, Santa came to the NICU!

Although there are two weekends before Christmas, I know that this is the last weekend when I will actually be able to get much done, so that is my plan. Maybe we’ll even get the tree up. (Maybe not.) How about you?

While I am getting things done, I will be listening to Christmas music. Here’s one of my favorite carols, based on an old Longfellow poem, and sung by Casting Crowns.