dual personalities

Category: Spirituality

“As with gladness men of old did the guiding star behold…

by chuckofish

…as with joy they hailed its light, leading onward, beaming bright;

so, most gracious Lord, may we evermore be led to thee.”*

IMG_3809.JPGAs you know, yesterday was the feast of the Epiphany. We got to sing “We Three Kings” in church and the Gospel lesson was the story of the Three Wise Men. The rector preached on the question, “What is it that you are seeking?” It is an important question to ask yourself.

Earlier in the weekend I went to an estate sale and bought a few books and a silver tray. I rescued some old lustreware plates, the kind that no one wants these days–$2 for four plates!

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I am not “seeking” more old things per se, but sometimes they are thrust upon me.

After that, I cleaned up my office, throwing away and/or recycling a lot of paper that builds up over the year. I did a lot of straightening up and filing. And the OM helped me take down the outside Christmas lights.

Then the wee babes came over on Sunday night to celebrate their mommy’s birthday

IMG_2215.JPGwith meatloaf and ice cream cake.

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Hello, Pan Am?

Of course, the babes found all the things I had put away. They love to pull books off the shelves. That is their duty as two-year-olds.The wee laddie is really into Jung.

IMG_3812.JPGThen we watched Three Godfathers (1948) as is our tradition on Epiphany. It is a great tradition because the film is so great.

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There were three wise men, Bob, and I’m one of ’em.

I especially noticed how really great it is as I had just watched Gunfight at the OK Corral (1957) the night before. The contrast is striking! Okay, I may have thought this VistaVision drama was great as a child…the song as sung by Frankie Laine is stirring…but the movie–direction, acting, screenplay–is terrible. It is one of those westerns that takes itself very seriously, way too seriously. But what is it saying? That is never clear. Burt Lancaster (Wyatt Earp) plays the marshall as a super-straight-laced, duty-bound good guy who is just boring.

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Mustn’t react to fiery redhead, Wyatt. That would be wrong.

On the other hand, Kurt Douglas (Doc Holiday) chews the scenery unashamedly in search of a motive and finds none.

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Was Ringo there?

He feels nothing but contempt for his girlfriend, but he is still enraged by her leaving him. What? Does he love her after all? Um, no. His actions clearly suggest otherwise. He is just a jerk, then, right? Both of our heroes are kind of jerks. In fact, the only hint of affection in this movie is between Doc and Wyatt, and we don’t want to go there, right? Well, the only character for whom I felt any sympathy was Jo Van Fleet as Kate, the whore. She is treated badly by everyone, but she still tries to help Doc, whom she loves even though he never appreciates her. Their scenes together at least have a little life in them.

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Why don’t you put a rope ’round my neck, and pull it when you want me?

The Clantons are just standard bad guys.  All the minor characters are stereotypes played by the B team.

Screen Shot 2019-01-06 at 1.54.07 PM.pngIt is such a mish-mosh! Really, there is no reason to watch it other than the great song by Dimitri Tiomkin and Ned Washington which you can hear here. While I was watching, I kept thinking about My Darling Clementine (1946) which in my opinion is the only good movie about the OK Corral. There is plenty of motivation in that movie, as well as character development and great acting. There is darkness in this movie and light. There is contrast. There is affection and friendship, loyalty, love. The real stuff.

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Walter Brennan as Ike Clanton, abusive father par excellence

[Interesting side note: John Ireland is in both movies as a member of the Clanton gang. File that one away for trivia night.]

So I guess my point is: watch either John Ford movie (Three Godfathers or My Darling Clementine) to see what a great movie is. Skip the 1950’s next-best-thing-to-color television (Gunfight at the OK Corral).

P.S. Yesterday was the 100th anniversary of the death of President Theodore Roosevelt. Join me in a toast!

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He’s not afraid.

*Hymn 119

“And offered there in his presence their gold, and myrrh, and frankincense”*

by chuckofish

…great is the mystery of godliness: God was manifest in the flesh, justified in the Spirit, seen of angels, preached unto the Gentiles, believed on in the world, received up into glory. (I Timothy 3:16)

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It is hard to believe that Christmas week is over. We tried to keep our focus where it belonged.

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@johnbcrist (Instagram)

Indeed, this thought was at the forefront of our minds…but the presents sure are fun.

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Also the Christmas movies…

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And the toasting…

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Alas, soon it will be back to the salt mine…but we’ll be celebrating one more time tonight with the wee babes, their parents and daughter #1. I think this calls for champagne!

*Hymn 109

Then let us all with one accord Sing praises to our heavenly Lord

by chuckofish

IMG_5182.JPGThis was the most precious moment of my Christmas Eve…the wee laddie sitting on my lap toward the end of the Christmas Eve service, entertaining himself by paging through the Book of Common Prayer. I mean, c’mon…

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

And, lo, the star, which they saw in the east, went before them…

by chuckofish

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“Is not my word like fire, says the Lord!” (Jeremiah 23:29)

“Gather ‘round that fire this Advent season,” advises John Piper. “It is warm. It is sparkling with colors of grace. It is healing for a thousand hurts. It is light for dark nights.” In other words, read some scripture this Advent!

If you are setting up your nativity scene with shepherds, the first to appear on the scene, you can read Luke 2: 1-20:

And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed.

(And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)

And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.

And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)

To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.

And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.

And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.

And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.

And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

10 And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.

11 For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord.

12 And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,

14 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

15 And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the Lord hath made known unto us.

16 And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger.

17 And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this child.

18 And all they that heard it wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds.

19 But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.

20 And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them.

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When you are setting up your creche with Wise Men, you can read Matthew 2: 1-12:

Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judaea in the days of Herod the king, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem,

Saying, Where is he that is born King of the Jews? for we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him.

When Herod the king had heard these things, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him.

And when he had gathered all the chief priests and scribes of the people together, he demanded of them where Christ should be born.

And they said unto him, In Bethlehem of Judaea: for thus it is written by the prophet,

And thou Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, art not the least among the princes of Judah: for out of thee shall come a Governor, that shall rule my people Israel.

Then Herod, when he had privily called the wise men, enquired of them diligently what time the star appeared.

And he sent them to Bethlehem, and said, Go and search diligently for the young child; and when ye have found him, bring me word again, that I may come and worship him also.

When they had heard the king, they departed; and, lo, the star, which they saw in the east, went before them, till it came and stood over where the young child was.

10 When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceeding great joy.

11 And when they were come into the house, they saw the young child with Mary his mother, and fell down, and worshipped him: and when they had opened their treasures, they presented unto him gifts; gold, and frankincense and myrrh.

12 And being warned of God in a dream that they should not return to Herod, they departed into their own country another way.

Screen Shot 2018-12-18 at 1.27.31 PM.pngYou will note that animals are not mentioned in the scripture. Even so, I always liked this song and this version by Sufjan Stevens is pretty straightforward.

I gave the wee babes the Fisher Price nativity set for their birthday.

Screen Shot 2018-12-18 at 2.49.54 PM.pngOf course, Lottie loves to play with it in her precise, careful way. The wee laddie likes to throw the pieces and has no respect for the baby Jesus, despite my remonstrances to the contrary.

FullSizeRender.jpeg(I did not give him this sweater. But I definitely approve.)

Keep on reading your scripture in these final days of Advent! Only six days ’til Christmas!

I choose joy

by chuckofish

Unknown.jpegI am still getting Christmas decorations out and finding a place for them. Other things must be put away. Annie and Andy were quite accommodating.

Unknown-3.jpegThis gang goes on the mantle.

Unknown-2.jpegBut I am not so sure where this gang is going to go…

Unknown-1.jpegThis weekend I will (hopefully) settle all these decorating issues.

These are issues I can deal with. Three years ago we were dealing with finding out the boy had cancer. Two years ago the twins were born at 27 weeks, 3 months premature, and their parents were camped out in the NICU. “Things happen,” as T.E. Lawrence said, “and we do our best to keep in the saddle.” We stayed in the saddle. We keep going.

Because there is always something to deal with. The ups and downs of business. The precarious-ness of jobs. They seem magnified at this time of year when we are so busy and so focused on the festivities of the season. What we really  need to focus on, of course, is the fact that “the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld  his glory, the glory as of the only begotten son of the Father,) full of grace and truth. (John 1:14)

It is Advent, after all. We are waiting. Let’s take a deep breath (or two) and ponder these things in our heart.

Listen to some good music.

Read something uplifting.

“He knew that all was well, because he had done the best that he could, from day to day. He had been true to the light that had been given to him. He had looked for more. And if he had not found it, if a failure was all that came out of his life, doubtless that was the best that was possible. He had not seen the revelation of “life everlasting, incorruptible and immortal.” But he knew that even if he could live his earthly life over again, it could not be otherwise than it had been.”
― Henry van Dyke, The Story of the Other Wise Man

This weekend I am going to finish my Christmas shopping, wrap a boatload of presents, decorate the big tree, get my house ready for visitors, go to church, and choose to be joyful.

Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.  But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen. (I Timothy 1: 15-17)

One more postcard

by chuckofish

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (Ephesians 2:10)

I promise I am just about done with posting about my pilgrimage, but one more thing…

You might remember a few years ago that a dear friend of mine went to the holy land and also attended a service at St. George’s Cathedral in Jerusalem. She snapped a picture of a needlepoint kneeler there with my name on it:

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When I was at the cathedral the Sunday before last, I looked high and low for this cushion, but could not find it!

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So frustrating…

However, I did take a few pictures of some of the other wonderful kneelers that are used there. They are from Anglican and Episcopal churches all over the world.

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Aren’t they wonderful? Some are a little worse for wear, but that’s okay. I like to think of all those women (and maybe a few men) who stitched them over the years.

Methinks it is a token of healthy and gentle characteristics, when women of high thoughts and accomplishments love to sew; especially as they are never more at home with their own hearts than while so occupied.  –Nathaniel Hawthorne, The Marble Faun, 1859

Postcards from the holy land

by chuckofish

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Our pilgrimage tour was made up of 39 members of two Episcopal churches, my own in flyover country and one from Westchester County, New York. We were a fairly diverse group, ranging in age from Millennial to Over-the-Hill. We had five priests with us, two padres and three madres (from the Caribbean, Colombia and Australia), and a Lutheran pastor. The rest of the group included a retired detective from the NYPD (gangland division), two recently graduated Georgetown lacrosse players,

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In the Jordan River where we renewed our baptismal vows

an elderly WASP named “Bif,” a handful of former Catholics, a mother-daughter team from Jupiter, FL, and your run-of-the-mill Episcopalians like me.

We all got along remarkably well. Sure, the cool kids sat in the back of the tour bus and laughed it up, but I am old enough now that I could care less about such things. The good-humored lacrosse players served as sheepdogs and brought up the rear, making sure that no one wandered too far afield. We didn’t lose anyone and nobody fell (except our rector, twice).

We were up and at ’em at 6 a.m. every morning and saw more than I can ever fully digest.

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The street where our Christian hotel was located in the Old City near the Jaffa Gate.

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Two thousand year old olive trees in what “tradition tells us” is the Garden of Gethsemane

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The greatest model/visual aid ever (ancient Jerusalem)

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Our tour guide with his disciples

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Sun goddess in Jaffa on the Mediterranean

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Well, I don’t want to be accused, like Christian by Apollyon, that “when you talk of your journey and of what you have heard and seen, you inwardly desire your own glory in all you do and say,” so I will stop.

It was a great trip; I’m glad I went.

“Hark! a thrilling voice is sounding. ‘Christ is nigh,’ it seems to say…”*

by chuckofish

Well, we are well into Advent and it was good to be back at my home church yesterday. Last Sunday we pilgrims were celebrating the first Sunday in Advent at St. George’s Cathedral in Jerusalem. Established in 1899, it is the seat of the Bishop of Jerusalem of the Episcopal Church in Jerusalem and the Middle East. The Bishop gave the sermon (in English and in Arabic) and we sang good old hymns. It was a lovely service.

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Meanwhile back at the ranch, daughter #1 was home and she helped me a lot getting out more Christmas stuff…

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putting up the outside lights and buying and setting up our small tree in the dining room.

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We also went to the church bazaar and to a couple of estate sales where we picked up some books, including the hard-to-find St. Louis Then and Now. She spotted it, grabbed my arm and stage-whispered, “Pick it up! Pick it up!” I knew then and there that daughter #1 has become a true estate sale-er with an eagle eye for the rare find!

We watched the 1951 A Christmas Carol with Alistair Sim (the best version) and The Bishop’s Wife (1947).

Screen Shot 2018-12-09 at 5.29.53 PM.pngThe wee babes and their parents came over for tacos on Saturday night. In 2 1/2 weeks the babes have apparently made huge leaps and bounds in the talking department.

IMG_2768.JPEGThe switch really flipped in the little guy and he is so verbal now! When you pick him up, he says, “Down!” Amazing.IMG_2766.jpegAfter daughter #1 left on Sunday, the OM and I girded our loins, donned our mittens and went to the Optimist lot to buy a big tree. We were successful and carted it home to the garage. Setting it up and decorating it will be a task for next weekend.

It’s good to be home.

*Hymns Ancient and Modern

Be that as it may*

by chuckofish

“There does not exist any more a holy mountain or a holy city or holy land which can be marked on a map. The reason is not that God’s holiness in space has suddenly become unworthy of Him or has changed into a heathen ubiquity. The reason is that all prophecy is now fulfilled in Jesus, and God’s holiness in space, like all God’s holiness, is now called and is Jesus of Nazareth.”
― Karl Barth

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Karl Barth is correct, of course. You can go to Israel and walk where Jesus walked and see the landscape that he saw, but he is risen and no longer there. And what is left, other than the landscape, is pretty crass.

I loved the Sea of Galilee,

IMGP1411.JPGthe sunrise

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IMGP1358.JPGI liked Capernaum, a fishing village on the northern shore of the Sea of Galilee where Jesus centered his public ministry in Galilee. I  liked sitting under the olive trees

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Screen Shot 2018-12-06 at 1.10.33 PM.pngBut once we were off to Cana, the site of Jesus’s first public miracle, changing water to wine at a wedding reception, where the Franciscans have built a church,

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they lost me.

I mean, I thought I was in Italy.

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I did not expect to have a big mountain-top experience or anything like that on this trip and I was not surprised to find the heavily Roman Catholic presence at the Christian sites there. I can even say I am grateful to the Crusaders and the Franciscans for preserving the Christian presence in a land that is, of course, 99% Jewish and Muslim now. Without them the sites would have been obliterated long ago.

On the other hand, most of the sites are fanciful at best. The Church of the multiplication of the loaves and fishes,

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the Church of the Annunciation, built over multiple “sacred spaces” that venerated the family home of Mary, Jesus’ mother,

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Jacob’s Well in Nablus, where Jesus asked a Samaritan woman to give him a drink,

Screen Shot 2018-12-06 at 2.14.02 PM.pngthe Church of Peter in Gallicantu (where the rooster crowed), the Church of the Nativity, the Church of the Shepherds’ Fields, the Church of the Visitation (honoring Mary’s visit to Elizabeth, who was told by an angel that Elizabeth was pregnant), the Church of St. John in the Mountains (said to be the birthplace of John the Baptist), the Church of Pater Noster (located on the Mount of Olives), the Church of All Nations (built on “the rock of the agony,” where Jesus prayed before his betrayal), the Church of the Holy Sepulchre (on the site where Christ died on the cross and rose from the dead), and so on and so on.

Good grief.

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I couldn’t help wondering what Jesus would make of all this.

We had a good guide, who rated the sites on a scale of 1-3 according to their historical veracity. Even so, let’s say that Jacob’s well may well be the actual well where Jesus drank water from the Samaritan woman, but the monstrosity built above it was quite distracting to me.

And all those places we visited having to do with the fabricated life of Mary? Sola scriptura was my mantra. I tried not to roll my eyes too much. I focused on the fantastic flora of Israel.

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Having said that, I had a wonderful time in Israel and I saw a lot of wonderful things and met a lot of wonderful people. I will focus on those wonderful things in my next posts.

So then, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh—  for if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body you will live.  For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God.  For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the spirit of sonship. When we cry, “Abba! Father!”  it is the Spirit himself bearing witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him. (Romans 8:12-17)

*Our guide was always saying this after explaining what something was. And then he would say, “It doesn’t matter, Jesus is not here. He is RISEN.”

What are you reading?

by chuckofish

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“That was his favorite thing about books—they took you off to other people’s lives an’ places, but you could still set in your own chair by th’ oil heater, warm as a mouse in a churn.”

–Jan Karon, Somewhere Safe With Somebody Good

As you know, when I am stressed, I turn to Jan Karon. Well, I have been stressed, so I am re-reading Somewhere Safe With Somebody Good. It’s just the ticket.

Meanwhile, I am checking things off my list. And if all else fails, I’ll remember what my rector told me on Sunday: “As long as you have your passport and a credit card, you’ll be fine.”

“Sleep in peace, God is awake.” (Victor Hugo)