“Saved my butt, my ass.”

by chuckofish

Well, this line made me LOL during my lunchtime viewing of Frasier yesterday and my mother suggested it would make a good blog title. DIBS, I declared.

Anyway, Daughter #1 here. Back on Wednesday with jokes at my own expense, probably related to relating to overweight men who joke about donuts and french fries.

Yesterday, I needed to run to Target to get some essentials (makeup remover, candy) and I thought I’d better get some toilet paper since apparently we are doing that again.

I almost threw a fit in the Target because SERIOUSLY.

After the depressing realization that I almost had to buy generic toilet paper, I immediately high-tailed it to the dessert aisle where for a moment I considered purchasing these:

I resisted the urge. And instead hit up the candy aisle.

In the chip aisle, I spotted this:

Yes, please.

Well, enough about my hopes and dreams.

Last week, Aunt Mary’s School for Misbehaving Tots opened its doors, meaning I got to watch the Bud for two days. It was great fun. And my co-workers enjoyed hearing him being noisy in the background during the staff meeting.

This weekend, while going through my Christmas stuff to find the cards I purchased last year, I found this gift my father gave me:

We all know I’m so fun! But did you know I am decorative gnome wine bottle topper on a DANNY KAYE THEMED WINE BOTTLE fun? I have four.

Speaking of lushes, this came in the mail for me yesterday:

Jane and Dagobert are my second-favorite borderline alcoholic, mystery-solving couple (with Nick and Nora being first) and it is absurd that they are not all in print. I got this on eBay.

Life is weird. But I’m not really complaining.