Hooray for Hollywood?

by chuckofish

Not.

The Oscars were more about the dresses and the ‘messy up-dos’ than the actual movies.

The host was obviously picked for being irreverent and vulgar, but the audience, which prides itself on being liberal and edgy, seemed shocked when he was just that. Clearly Seth MacFarlane knew this might happen and he and his writers even worked the joke into his opening monologue with William Shatner as Captain Kirk telecommuting from the future to warn MacFarlane that he was about to ruin the Oscars and be branded the worst Oscar host ever.

But none of it was funny really, and it all fell flat. All those self-satisfied celebrity “actors” wanted to do was pat themselves on the back. Politics is taboo. All that’s left is: Kiss kiss, you look wonderful! It was a big PC muddle. And the awards (no surprises) were all over the proverbial map. Something for everyone and no one stood out. Do you remember anything anyone said?

I think daughter #1 and friends look every bit as "sophisticated'' as many of the Hollywood wannabees, don't you?

I think daughter #1 and friends look every bit as “sophisticated” as many of the Hollywood wannabees, don’t you?

I’ll just say what everyone is thinking: Why can’t Billy Crystal just do the Oscars forever–like Bob Hope used to do? And remember Johnny Carson? Back when the Academy Award Show had some class.

(Click on this gif) Sorry. No class.

Sorry. No class.

I was glad that Ang Lee won for Best Director and Daniel Day-Lewis deserved his Oscar. But I wish I had those 4 hours back. I could have scrubbed the shower. Or watched Sunset Boulevard.

"I'm ready for my close-uo, Mr. DeMille!"

“I’m ready for my close-uo, Mr. DeMille!”

The highlight for me was “drunk-texting” with daughter #1 and daughter #2–although I was drinking ginger ale and no one was actually drunk.

image

We had fun, although perhaps if we had indeed been drunk, it would have seemed funnier. But it was a school night after all.

Okay, I just have to say one more thing. Renee Zellweger, whom I have always despised, looked liked she rolled out of bed to drive carpool and mistakenly threw on a shiny gold dress.

(via Huffpost.com)

(via Huffpost.com)

They even screwed up the In Memoriam section by padding it with marketing executives. Well, onward and upward.